tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65858306257199145612024-03-13T23:22:19.789-07:00Dobie Maxwell's 'Dented Can' DiaryThe life and lumps of a 'dented can' professional comedian.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger2380125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-77876339094794875152014-08-23T10:47:00.000-07:002014-08-23T10:47:18.099-07:00Mending Fences<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Friday August 22<sup>nd</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">We interrupt this regularly scheduled sabbatical to bring
you some positive news for a change! I have been taking a break from cataloging
my daily thoughts in order that I might devote my full energy to my forthcoming
book about having to testify against my childhood best friend because he
decided to rob a bank he used to work at – twice – and then try to blame one of
them on me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I had forgotten just how fascinating a story it is, as I have been far
too close to it all these years and if anything have been trying to move past
it and make it all go away. Well, hugely impactful events like that don’t ever just
go away, but at least I’m now able to examine it in retrospect with complete
objectivity. It was a very unpleasant experience, but time has healed much of
that pain.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Another unpleasant event happened five years ago this month. I’d worked
a week at a comedy club in my hometown of Milwaukee, and had the ultimate sin
happen – my check bounced. That is the granddaddy of all evils in the comedy
business, and emotions tend to flare up in a hurry.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That was an ugly situation all around, and I wish it never happened. I
also wish the bank robber had never pulled his little stunt once much less
twice, but life rarely unfolds how we’d like. We get what we get, and then have
to deal with it the best we can. All too often, we make mistakes.</span></div>
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</span>All kinds of mistakes were made in this particular situation, and it
ended up with all parties not speaking. I had worked for that club for several years
and for the booker Funny Business Agency out of Grand Rapids, MI a lot longer
than that. This one isolated incident ended up doing severe damage and erased decades
of positive history. I don’t know why that check bounced, but it did.</span></div>
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</span>What I do know is that I was absolutely fuming at the time. I was hurt,
insulted and felt totally disrespected by both the club and by Funny Business.
I did them all a favor by taking the gig for low money in the summer, but a
friend of mine at the time was in charge of her class reunion and requested
that I be the headliner that week. It all blew up, and I eventually lost the
friendship too.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I will admit that on more than one occasion I have used this forum as a
way to vent my feelings, but I attempt to do it in a way that hopefully helps an
aspiring comedian coming up the ranks that may experience something similar to
deal with that situation – hopefully better than I often do.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am very honest and upfront with my mistakes, and I have made too many
to count. I’ve done some smart things too, but those often go unrecognized.
What stick out are all the flubs, and they tend to make the rounds in a few circles.
Why anything I would write or think would matter even the least little bit to
anybody baffles me, but apparently my words have more clout than I realize.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I let loose with a few tirades during that whole time, and I regret
doing that. I mainly did it for me to get my frustrations out about a terrible
situation, not realizing that a significant number of others in the business
could and did see it, and that made everything worse. I’m sorry I did that.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How it ended up playing out is that I eventually got my money several
weeks later, but I had to eat bounced check fees for five checks that I wrote
on the one that bounced. Again, I was fuming and that anger fueled some of my
rants. I wasn’t thinking with my head, but with my emotions.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That ended the relationship with Funny Business, and it was a big
lose/lose. They have a bulk of their work in the Midwest, where I happen to be
located. I am a very solid headliner, and have decades of experience working
virtually every scenario from comedy clubs to corporate events to colleges to
cruise ships. It would be smart for both of us to maintain a professional
relationship.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I admit that I took this all very personally, and I’m not proud of it. I
write all the time about the relationship between booking agents and
performers, and how our mindsets are about as opposite as can be. We’re
different personality types entirely, and quite often sparks will fly because
of it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What made it even worse was that a new person was entering the mix at
that time. John Yoder is the owner of Funny Business, and I had been working with
him for years. He has several sons, and has been incorporating them into the
business in recent years. That’s common in businesses of all kinds, but
unfortunately it can cause heat when old clients have to deal with the new son.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>John’s son Eric was coming onto the scene exactly at that time, and he
is the one that ended up handling much of the situation in question. I felt
disrespected that John would shuffle off such an important issue on his son,
and that put more gas on the fire. I flipped out and said some things I wish I
hadn’t, and it all spiraled down into a flaming heap of manure that splattered
on everyone.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, cut ahead five years. Funny Business Agency has survived without
Dobie Maxwell, and vice versa. The world is still spinning, and life goes on
for us all – screwed up as it may be. I had other problems creep up as they
tend to do, and had basically moved on in my mind from it all.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In pops Eric Feinendegen. We have been working together for about a
year, and we both have strengths in different areas. Eric is very corporate,
and I’m helping him with his speaking career. He’s helping me with the business
aspect of what I do, and we have been great for each other. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Eric is in the process of learning the comedy business, and stumbled
upon the Funny Business Agency online and asked if I worked for them. I told
him the story, and how I thought the bridge was burned for good. Eric took it
upon himself to initiate a conversation with John Yoder, and it ended up with
me sending an apology to both John and Eric Yoder – and meaning it. I truly
did.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I can’t control how anybody else acts, but I can control my own actions.
No matter what went down that caused me to react the way I did, I’m ashamed of
it and that’s not me. I’m bigger than that, and I couldn’t be more delighted
that Eric Feinendegen reached out and started this process.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>John Yoder admitted that he didn’t handle the situation well from his
end, and that went a long way on my end too. I did feel there was a wrong
there, and to admit it really put out any possible lingering embers. It’s
history and completely in the past, even though it did some nasty damage.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As for what’s next, I’m not really sure but that’s ok. I didn’t do this
just to try and get booked, and if Funny Business never uses me again I hold no
grudges. This is about making things right and moving on. I removed all past posts
pertaining to this issue, and I want it all to be over. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> The Yoders don’t have
to invite me over for Thanksgiving dinner, but at least if John or Eric and I are
in the same room, we don’t have to avoid each other. I don’t want lingering unfinished
business in my life. I reconnected with my siblings after decades apart, and now
this. 2014 is a stellar year!</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-J-2xert-Dhs/U_jTPaa8vRI/AAAAAAAACFo/Xvwbn-c23bg/s1600/Funny%2BBusiness.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-J-2xert-Dhs/U_jTPaa8vRI/AAAAAAAACFo/Xvwbn-c23bg/s1600/Funny%2BBusiness.jpg" height="91" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">After a five year gap, it feels great to have mended fences with John and Eric Yoder of Funny Business Agency. Lingering issues do no good for anybody.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-emXnytxEAzY/U_jTQYMdzHI/AAAAAAAACFw/raORMmaTBY8/s1600/eric%2Bfeinendegen.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-emXnytxEAzY/U_jTQYMdzHI/AAAAAAAACFw/raORMmaTBY8/s1600/eric%2Bfeinendegen.jpg" height="320" width="212" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Special thanks to Eric Feinendegen for initiating contact. Without him this never would have happened. His brilliant diplomatic skills made this possible. Thanks Eric!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-78135996292332041692014-08-01T21:30:00.001-07:002014-08-01T22:35:04.572-07:00Another Sabbatical<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: small;"><b>Friday August 1st, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</b><br /><br /> I need to take another sabbatical from writing this particular diary. I think if nothing else I have proven that I can crank out material consistently – even if it has a tendency to rattle the cages of some on occasion. I don’t set out to do that or anything else but let my innermost feelings flow.<br /><br /> As I said before my last predetermined break - which ended up only lasting a month – I will be back when I feel I have something to say. I didn’t stay gone long, and I am still flattered by all of the tremendous emails of support I received from so many that I didn’t even realize were readers.<br /><br /> This time my reason for leaving is different. I need to focus on and FINALLY finish a book of the horrific experiences I went through having had to testify in Federal Court against my former childhood best friend that robbed a bank he used to work at – twice. Anyone that has known me for a long time has either heard the story or bits and pieces, and it has without fail captivated all.<br /><br /> The reason I can confidently boast of how great a story it is is because I did not write it. It just unfolded in front of me and all I have to do is report what happened. I guess I really was lucky to have been given such an amazing gift, but it sure was painful to live through as it all played out.<br /><br /> I admit that for years I was avoiding it. I didn’t want to go back there in my head, as it was so torturous an experience. Having to testify against one’s very best friend is as ugly as I ever want to imagine. I still have the occasional nightmare even now, but the time has come to get it out of me once and for all. Putting it into book form will allow me to move on from that painful stretch.<br /><br /> Years from now, all kinds of people will read it and be riveted. Most are. People I have told the full story to often become totally engrossed. When I told it on the Bob and Tom radio show I was deluged with emails from all over the country from strangers who were all absolutely fascinated.<br /><br /> I feel in my deepest heart that this is the project I need to focus on and get it off my plate once and for all. I fully believe it will open a lot of doors for me that aren’t open now, and if nothing else it will give me a product NOBODY else has. It is exclusive unto me, and will set me apart.<br /><br /> For however long it takes to finish this project, I will devote any and all spare time to getting it done. My original intention was to work on it for June, July and August – but here it is August 1 and I’ve frittered away yet another summer. I have made excuses long enough. It has to get done.<br /><br /> My good friend Lynn Miner has offered to edit the manuscript, and he has lots of experience as he has had almost thirty books of his own published. He knows the process well, and it is kind of him to offer his help. I will take him up on it, and he has already made outstanding suggestions.<br /><br /> All the parts of the story are there, as I wrote a skeleton outline about fifteen years ago not long after it all happened. I was not nearly the writer I am now, and all these years of making posts on a daily basis have strengthened my skill level exponentially. I already feel a major improvement.<br /><br /> I spent about four hours today getting the old manuscript ready to revamp. I’ll make occasional posts here if something of note occurs, but that is my focus. If you want to sign up for my monthly comedy newsletter, please send me your email address at dobiemaxwell@aol.com. I'll let you know when the book is ready. If you enjoy this diary you will love the book. Thanks again for your loyal support! Good bye for now.</span><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-HDwDZt8zuJs/U9xpFVi0LeI/AAAAAAAACFI/CkxbZZd0hek/s1600/good+bye+wave.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-HDwDZt8zuJs/U9xpFVi0LeI/AAAAAAAACFI/CkxbZZd0hek/s1600/good+bye+wave.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I need to take another extended break so I can finish my first book - a most amazing true life story. Hope to be back here sooner than later. Thanks again for your support!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-38439351834690402932014-07-31T06:13:00.001-07:002014-07-31T06:13:10.353-07:00The Quick Flip<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Monday July 28<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Waukegan, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’m still basking in the radiant glory of my killer business
triumph yesterday, flipping the stash of toy cars I nabbed for $2 at a thrift
store for a cool crisp twenty. Actually the bill was a kind of soggy and
rumpled, but twenty bucks is twenty bucks. The point is I made a profit for
little work.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s the pure essence of what every fly by night huckster has been
attempting to do since the beginning of time. It has never been easy, and never
will be. I just happened to luck out and I am fully aware of that fact. The
universe threw me a couple of bones, and I flipped them for twenty.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I realize it’s only $20, but there are much larger implications
involved. What if I had purchased an item for $200 and sold it for $2000? I
would be a lot more excited than I am now – and I truly am now. It feels great
to pull off a successful deal, but it also makes me wonder if I did it right.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My two main wheeler dealer mentors have traditionally been quick
flippers, and both of them were able to stay in business twenty years or more.
They may have varied on rare occasion, but for the most part they’d get
something in and flip it right back out. If they doubled their original
investment, they’d do it day and night until they couldn’t do it anymore. Then
they’d do it again.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Greed is part of the human bag of tricks, and everyone thinks about how
they can score a sweet financial deal that gives a ridiculous return. This is
why casinos stay in business. People that won big can’t just walk away and
appreciate that they won. They have to try and clean the casino out.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I must admit I did think on the way home yesterday that I could have
kept those cars for a little while and tried to move them on Ebay. I only went
to one dealer, and he gave me my price. What I don’t know for sure is, was my
price correct? Ten times my investment is great, but did I have a stellar load
that could have sold for a lot more? That would have involved a lot of extra
activity.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I would have had to list what I had for sale on Ebay (which I have never
done before), write up all the sales notes, take pictures and eventually mail
them to each buyer. Maybe I could have put them all in one lot, or maybe I
should have split them up into several. There were many options. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My initial investment was very small, so I could afford to sit on the
whole bag as long as I felt like it. Knowing me that would be months or even
years, and I don’t want to start stockpiling old clutter at this point in my
life. I want to get rid of as much as I can, and only collect cash piles if I
collect anything at all. I was able to turn my investment into a healthy
return, so I’ll accept that.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I also came across some old sports cards I forgot I saved. They weren’t
anything great, but they were old and worth something so I took them to a
sports card shop today and got $40. I can’t put an exact price on what I had in
them, but I’d rough guess $20. I bought them several years ago so I’ll count
that as total profit. They were just lying around, and I turned them into in pocket
cash.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Who hasn’t had the dream of starting with something tiny and turning it
into a fortune? This is not the first time I’ve done deals like this, but I
always end up needing the money and that ends the game before it starts. I’ve
got a couple of other trinkets I can cash in, and I should be close to $100. That’s
a nice round number to start, and I’ll keep watching for deals. They’re out there.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-yvLJYA5D69Q/U9pAxOxGBAI/AAAAAAAACE4/PNVXf4fI-MY/s1600/franklin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-yvLJYA5D69Q/U9pAxOxGBAI/AAAAAAAACE4/PNVXf4fI-MY/s1600/franklin.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">From now on, this is the only collectible I am interested in acquiring mass quantities of.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-60445896611104725402014-07-31T05:48:00.002-07:002014-07-31T05:48:26.865-07:00Trans Am Treasures<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Sunday July 27<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Wilmot, WI</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I was walking through a thrift store a couple of weeks ago
and ran across a bag of toy cars that were on sale for $2. It was a generous
sized bag for that price, and I noticed it was packed with a collection of
Pontiac Trans Ams for whatever reason. When I was growing up that was a hot
car.</span></div>
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</span>Somebody had obviously been collecting them, and they were donated. I have
always liked toy cars, and anytime I can cop a sizeable load of them for a low
price I’ll do it if for no other reason than I like to give them away to kids.
The look in their eyes when they get a big bag is priceless.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This seemed like an especially good find, so I gambled the two bucks
knowing I wouldn’t lose. I opened them in the car, and was impressed with the
quality of the load. There were Hot Wheels and Matchbox and Corgi which are all
brand names. They were in top notch condition and there was a nice variety.
There were also a couple of slot cars – both Trans Ams – and a Batmobile.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When I got home I immediately emptied the bag for a count, and it was
27. Not shabby. That’s far less than a dime a car. I looked up some of them on
Ebay, and saw they had asking prices of up to $15 a car. There was a Hot Wheels
special edition that was a mail in offer exclusively, and there were four of
those. The Batmobile had asking prices between $10-$15, so I knew I’d be ok.</span></div>
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</span>Even the no name Trans Ams had to be worth at least a buck each, and
there were also a couple of higher end Matchbox models of older cars that were
in excellent shape. There were also a few cheapo cars in the bag that would
probably sell for a quarter or less, but as a whole it was a haul.</span></div>
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</span>Today I took my weekly run through the flea market in Wilmot, WI and
decided to bring along the bag of cars to see if I could sell them as a whole.
I would much rather turn a quick profit and let some vendor make out than set
up and sweat my Sunday away trying to sell them all myself.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My cousin Jef Parker used to own Collector’s Edge Comics in Milwaukee,
and I would watch him wheel and deal comic book collections. He said there were
always two strategies, and buyers had to decide if they wanted to flip it for a
quick profit or piece it out in detail and squeeze every cent out. The latter
would entail much more time, effort and expense so he preferred the former.</span></div>
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</span>I also watched master sports card dealer Ray Gunderson of Gunderson’s
Sports Cards in West Allis, WI pull off deal after deal and that was his
strategy too. He was always about a quick flip – even if he lost out in the
long run. He didn’t care if the buyer got an extra good deal, and in fact he
wanted that so they’d come back and buy from him again. “This ain’t no museum,”
he’d say. </span></div>
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</span>Whatever he paid for anything, he’d move it out the door for 2-3 times
what he paid for it. He kept his doors open for 20 years doing that, and
everyone thought he was crazy for having such low prices. But his success was
being able to buy low, and he did it regularly. He was a master.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>That’s exactly what I did with this bag of cars. I stumbled upon it by
chance, and it was able to be had for the right price. I suppose I could have
farted around on Ebay and maybe made $100 or more, but I settled for a quick
$20 from a dealer who was sweating in the sun. Maybe I could’ve tried for $40
or $60, but I kept it fair. I made a nice profit for doing nothing. I’ll take
it and run.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/---wwckxkyhY/U9o6y5-KQ6I/AAAAAAAACEM/2xPeRw_f8Eg/s1600/CAM00338.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/---wwckxkyhY/U9o6y5-KQ6I/AAAAAAAACEM/2xPeRw_f8Eg/s1600/CAM00338.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I copped a great load of toy cars at a thrift store for $2.</td></tr>
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<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JJ8IewoD1NE/U9o60IdHB4I/AAAAAAAACEQ/mvZaVCMUCLc/s1600/CAM00339.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JJ8IewoD1NE/U9o60IdHB4I/AAAAAAAACEQ/mvZaVCMUCLc/s1600/CAM00339.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This isn't even all of them. I feel like a miniature used car dealer.</td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-53682620596890864512014-07-30T06:40:00.002-07:002014-07-30T07:04:35.163-07:00Buffet Of Danger<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Saturday July 26<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Does life ever get even a little easier for any of us at any
time? I’m beginning to think it never does, and that scares me. Well maybe not
scares, but absolutely disappoints. I’d hate to think we plow through the
treacherous jungle this planet can be, only to leave with no payoff. That
stinks.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The human experience as I have observed it is a constant evolution of
change, and each change brings with it a spanking new set of ominous obstacles
to have to figure out a way to get over. It would certainly be nice to have at
least a little time to enjoy the scenery, but the intense struggle always seems
to require more than just casual attention – at least for me anyway. It never
rests.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My problems have always been different than most everyone else’s in my
immediate circle, but I always assumed I would receive a higher payoff. When I
was a kid I knew other kids that came from various levels of dysfunction, but
nobody was close to my situation and it was a distraction. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I really struggled through childhood when I should have been just
enjoying being a kid. I never had that chance, but I assumed adulthood would be
easier. Then I chose to get into THE craziest business around, filled with
instability at every turn. Adulthood has been a buffet of danger also.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Again, I assumed I’d meet a great woman and build a good life anyway.
Well, I met a bunch of women that may or may not have been great but I knew
inside that I wasn’t ready to put together the life I always dreamed of. That’s
why I got into radio, assuming it would bring along stability. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Boy, do I have to quit assuming. Nothing could have been more unstable,
and life has been one crisis after another for as long as I can remember. I
know everyone has problems, but not quite as unique or complex as mine. I don’t
know anyone else that has had to testify in court against their best friend
from childhood for robbing the same bank twice. Those kinds of events leave
scars.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I wouldn’t wish anyone that mental torture, and I still have nightmares
about it. Another rotten feeling is moving across the country for a job, then
having that job taken away with zero backup. I know that has happened to
others, but I’ve had it happen five times. I’m still hurting from that too, and
I never had anyone to go to for help or support. I’ve made it this far without
a safety net.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Now I’m reconnecting with the siblings I never got to grow up with as a
kid, and it has opened up a tremendous window of hope. It feels SO good to
begin this process – even this late into the game. It is what I have always wanted,
and I feel it only getting better. Meeting a woman I could spend quality time with
is still on the bucket list, but that’s extremely difficult in my current
situation.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I thought for sure I would be financially secure by now and on my way
but I’m a shopping cart and cardboard sign away from vagrancy, and I’m living
week to week despite the fact I’m trying harder than I ever have. Life is
constantly changing, and now that I finally figured out my craft it seems like
nobody wants it anymore. I am a master blacksmith but nobody is buying horseshoes.</span></div>
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</span>On top of that, I’m still dealing with depression and diabetes issues.
Both of those require a lot of attention and effort, but how can I do that when
I’ve got to focus on survival? There aren’t any trust funds with my name on it,
and I’m screwed. No wonder old people are salty. Life is HARD.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FZgNggX3U5w/U9j1HtsIOPI/AAAAAAAACD0/J2b6GzbK5oY/s1600/old+people+crabby.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FZgNggX3U5w/U9j1HtsIOPI/AAAAAAAACD0/J2b6GzbK5oY/s1600/old+people+crabby.jpg" height="191" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Life seems to get harder as it goes on. No wonder old people can be so crabby.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ujKb35O7woc/U9j1iylnBzI/AAAAAAAACD8/dyrwTgrJk9o/s1600/hottie+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ujKb35O7woc/U9j1iylnBzI/AAAAAAAACD8/dyrwTgrJk9o/s1600/hottie+2.jpg" height="320" width="225" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">She doesn't look crabby. I wonder if she wants to have lunch?</td></tr>
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</span></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-50617738354269885942014-07-28T22:11:00.002-07:002014-07-28T22:11:50.060-07:00Mentor Magic<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Friday July 25<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Milwaukee, WI</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I love being a mentor. It’s got a lot of the same rewards of
fatherhood without having to change any diapers. I have had some tremendous
mentees along the way of all ages, and it’s funny when they have been
physically older than me. It doesn’t matter, as they are still in the role of
student. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am a student myself of many things, but in comedy I am the mentor.
It’s one of the few topics I’m able to speak on with relative authority, even
though the entire time I am teaching I remain a dedicated learner. I just
happen to be farther along than most, so I can reach back and nurture.</span></div>
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</span>The challenge of figuring out how to bring out the best in each
individual is something I never get tired of. Everybody is different, and
mentoring is not something that is started and finished in one session. It’s
long term, and requires dedication and input from both parties. I really enjoy
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>One of my current favorites is twelve year old Trevor Burke along with
his father Joe. Joe took one of my classes at Zanies in Chicago many years ago,
and now Trevor is doing comedy. He’s a super kid and I have grown to really
like him – even though I would highly recommend that kids don’t do standup
comedy for more than fun. There are several reasons for that, and all are
legit.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>First off, kids don’t have the life experience to be able to draw upon
for material. They are in a tough spot, and I don’t think it’s fair to the
average kid to put them in a position to be on stage in front of total
strangers – especially adults. Too many things can go wrong, and it’s
intimidating.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Second, bombing on stage can be an absolutely horrific experience. I
wouldn’t want to throw a kid – especially one I like – into such a precarious position
with any sort of regularity. If the kid is doing a talent show at school or
something for other kids, fine. But as a career path? No way.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Of course there are exceptions to almost every rule, and Trevor is it.
Joe has a background with entertainment, as his brother had a band. Joe is
fully aware of the pitfalls, and is very good in the way he keeps Trevor
grounded. He and his wife Pam are excellent parents, and it all just works.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>People frequently ask me, “Is the kid funny?” He’s a KID. He’s still
developing as a person, so it’s unfair to put adult expectations on him or any
other child. He’s funny enough, and should he decide to stay with standup as he
matures, I think he’s got an extremely bright future. What he is loaded with is
likeability and experience. He’s been acting for years, and is at home on the
stage.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He enjoys performing, and that’s a huge part of it. He’s a novelty right
now, and everyone gets that. He’s getting a lot of attention because Joe knows
how to play the entertainment game. He is Trevor’s manager, and it’s a chance
for them to bond as father and son but still develop a career.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Tonight I rode to Milwaukee with them both and watched Trevor compete in
a talent contest at a street fair. It wasn’t the greatest of circumstances, but
he went up and did his set anyway. There was a girl about his age that was a
singer, and she had a bunch of her family come out so she was the winner
because it was based on audience response. Trevor wasn’t disappointed, and we
went to dinner at The Safe House afterward. It was fun to hang out, and no
matter what happens I will still be his mentor and friend. Comedy is a nasty
racket. I want to see him enjoy his childhood.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iI9SYkPbh6A/U9cs5E082_I/AAAAAAAACDg/VsSzMOypCJo/s1600/trevor+burke.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iI9SYkPbh6A/U9cs5E082_I/AAAAAAAACDg/VsSzMOypCJo/s1600/trevor+burke.jpg" height="320" width="216" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Trevor Burke has done more in show business at age 12 than most do in a lifetime. Plus, he's a really nice kid too. I'm a big fan. www.trevorburke.com</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-42027072538135714512014-07-28T21:35:00.002-07:002014-07-28T21:41:41.355-07:00Sports Comedy With Balls<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Thursday July 24<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">A lot of things sound really great in theory. Communism is a
big one, but nobody has been able to pull it off successfully for any
significant amount of time. Polygamy is another. It sounds like a party, but
there are laws against it for a reason. The success of any idea lies in the
execution.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When I lived in Los Angeles in the mid ‘90s, I knew I needed a gimmick
to separate me from a ridiculously large glut of white males trying to make a
dent in standup comedy. Supply was FAR greater than demand even then, and I saw
it. From my longstanding background in pro wrestling promotion, I zeroed in on
a persona I thought would get me the most attention and get me seen.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That idea was to become “The Sports Comedian - With Balls”. I’d asked my
friend and mentor Ross Bennett what he thought I should focus on, and he asked
me what topics I knew best. I told him I knew sports, and I wasn’t lying. I
have been a rabid sports fan since I was able to tie shoes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Ross’s answer was fast and simple: “Well, why don’t you call yourself
The Sports Comedian?”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It clicked with me immediately, and I spent all the money I had at the
time to get photos taken in sports jerseys. I even had sports cards of me
printed up. I got a crew cut like I though a sports comedian should have, and I
proceeded to try and book myself. That’s where the glitch came in.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I didn’t think of it at the time, but not everyone is as enthusiastic
about sports as I am. In fact, a whole lot of people couldn’t care less about
it – especially women. Granted, there are quite a few women that do follow
sports at least casually, but not nearly enough to support what I was doing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I vividly recall getting on stage with this idea more than a few times,
and seeing people’s faces tune out as soon as I said I was going to talk about
sports. There were some nights that went very well, but it was too inconsistent
so I dropped it after a few months and dove head first right back into the pool
of anonymous Caucasians. “Mr. Lucky” is what I tried next, and that jury’s still
out.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Times have changed and so have I, and I think the time is right to try
this idea again. I have the chance to dust it off on Monday August 11<sup>th</sup>,
at Zanies Comedy Club on Wells Street in Chicago. Every few months they give me
a Monday night and let me do whatever I want – within reason. I told them I
wanted to try this idea, and they gave me the thumbs up. I really think it will
succeed.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Everything is so compartmentalized with the advent of the internet, and
that wasn’t the case the first time I tried. If this is marketed correctly –
and that’s the rub for just about anything – I know I can carve out a great
niche market. People that love sports are rabid, and there are MILLIONS of us
nationwide. If I can tap into that market, I have to believe I can make a
comfortable living.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Even if I would only do it part time, I think I could still do more than
ok. Every sports team on every level has an awards banquet or a pre season kick
off dinner, and if this idea was presented properly I know it would get some
bites. Well, I think so anyway. Here’s my chance to prove it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve got a killer lineup of comedians already lined up, and if nothing
else it will be fun to hang out with them. I am going to rattle all the media
cages I can, and hope I can get some publicity.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-UKjpJdmHIjM/U9ckR-PMMMI/AAAAAAAACDQ/7-kLjDFQFNo/s1600/Dobie+Maxwell+Sports+Card.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-UKjpJdmHIjM/U9ckR-PMMMI/AAAAAAAACDQ/7-kLjDFQFNo/s1600/Dobie+Maxwell+Sports+Card.jpg" height="320" width="228" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Twenty years ago I stuck everything I had into this gimmick. The time wasn't right then, but maybe it is now. Come out to Zanies Comedy Club in Chiacgo August 11th if you like sports. www.zanies.com</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Wednesday July 23<sup>rd</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I want to talk more about the whole game of getting on
television. Ultimately, it’s what makes or breaks a true career in the
entertainment business and everyone that succeeds needs to master it and find
their outlet. Some may have a different platform than others, but television is
the key.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It used to be that once a comedian – and I’m sure singers, dancers,
magicians, ventriloquists as well – got on a big show like Ed Sullivan or
Johnny Carson, they were as good as set. They’d get all the agents that were
anyone fighting over them, and usually end up with a guaranteed income.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There were a few that flamed out, but for the most part those shows were
the showcase for the very best of the best in any field of entertainment. If
one was lucky enough to get on a show like that, literally MILLIONS would see
them in one shot. It’s not like that anymore, and never will be. The days of
the world wide mega star entertainer are over thanks to one reason - the
internet. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There will be a few that slip through, but it won’t be like it was.
Everybody in society had seen Bob Hope when he was popular, but not everybody
has seen Justin Timberlake or Beyonce. The fan bases of those people tend to be
in their own generation, and it’s not necessarily a negative.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It sure allows for more specialized serving of one’s audience, and also
gives more entertainers a taste of the enormous success that used to be
reserved for only the elite marquee names like an Elvis or Frank Sinatra before
him. The Beatles were huge too, as was Michael Jackson. Now we have a ton of
acts carving out their own smaller empires, with most of the world oblivious to
it.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Getting on television is still important, but not nearly as important as
knowing how to manage the internet. The game has changed completely now in that
schmuckos like me and everyone else with a computer can technically throw our
hats in the ring and start making our own appearances on “television”. It’s not
network television, but the possibility does exist for it to be seen all over.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m not just talking national television, I’m talking WORLD WIDE. “Going
viral” is possible, even though it’s not likely just like buying a lottery
ticket doesn’t make you likely to win. What it does is gives one a chance to
win, and today’s entertainer needs to come up with a battle plan.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The biggest mistake I’ve seen made over and over is people putting
things out there too soon. I hear the newbies talking about how they have six
videos and four CDs and “did an hour” at some toilet club somewhere that was
recorded and is now a “one hour special”. I hear this constantly.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The trick is to make a special truly special. Years of hard work and
polish can’t be avoided if a comedian or any other act wants to break through
the crowd. These are things nobody gets told at the beginning, and it’s wrongly
assumed everything they do needs to be recorded and thrown out there for the universe
to see. I equate this with dirty diapers. Should those be displayed openly?</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Of course not. They should be changed in private and thrown out.
Eventually the baby will not need to wear one anymore, and it’s a non issue.
The same is true for entertainers. Don’t show us your dirty diapers on You Tube
or anywhere else. It’s a whole new game, and I need to master it like everyone else.
It’s a good thing I have a lifetime of experience. I am really going to need it.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kyjZYaimsp4/U9XB3F0-_8I/AAAAAAAACDA/XpnsmoFJoAw/s1600/mom+diaper.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kyjZYaimsp4/U9XB3F0-_8I/AAAAAAAACDA/XpnsmoFJoAw/s1600/mom+diaper.jpg" height="239" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dirty diapers are NOT for public display. Too many newbie comedians seem to think every brutal set they do needs to be up on You Tube.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-62047099238000427002014-07-27T20:05:00.000-07:002014-07-27T20:05:13.771-07:00A Cup Of Coffee<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tuesday July 22<sup>nd</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Oh, how time flies. Four years ago today my appearance on
“The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson” aired. I’d recorded it the previous
March, and by the time it ran I honestly thought it would never air. When it
did, it was a tremendous experience – at least for people around me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>For whatever reason, that super short four and a half minutes on
national television at 1:30am was a whole lot more impressive to people than
the lifetime it took to get there. To me it wasn’t that big of a deal, because
it was the easy part. All I had to do was walk out there and do a whole lot
less time than I’m used to doing. It was like a night off, but that’s what put
me over the top.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As far as credibility is concerned, making it to national television
even once is proof of having played in the majors. It’s not a guarantee of a
lifetime of problem free bliss, but neither is making the majors in any kind of
sport or entertainment genre. Lots of people have more problems after they get
there than before they started, and I’m sure more than a few wish they had never
started.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There is so much involved to “making it big” in any genre of
entertainment, but the one factor nobody can ever gain control over is luck.
Things happen good and bad, and that’s just how it is. I freely admit that I
got very lucky in a good way to have the door open to get on the show, but I
also knew what to do with that luck when I got it. I had to play the game for a
while, but I did it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I went back and forth with the talent booker, and then they changed
talent bookers. Then they did it again. Then the original person came back, and
I started all over again. It took a couple of years to play out, but I got my
spot and no matter what else I ever do nobody can take that away.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Several years have gone by now, and I haven’t gotten anything close to
that kind of a break in anything I’ve tried. Did I put forth any less effort
during that time? NO WAY. In fact, I probably put in more, but I had a few bad
breaks health wise and that took me out. Again, it’s all part of it. That was a
bad break just like initially getting the call to open for Craig Ferguson was
positive.</span></div>
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</span>After living through this process and seeing it with others I know
personally, I totally see why there are one hit wonders in music. If it’s this
complicated for a comedian, I can’t begin to think what it must be like for a
band. Talent isn’t the only thing that puts an act over the top. It’s many
things, and everything has to line up at the right place and time for a career
to really take root.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>None of this is said with bitterness, but I think it’s important to note
that there are a number of ingredients needed to bake a cake. I’ll also be the
first to admit I’ve shot myself in the foot more than once, but that happens to
others too. Michael Vick is one of the most blatant examples of all time, but he
still managed to come back and salvage a decent career. Not everyone gets that
shot.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s hard to say if I will ever catch another break as big as the ones
I’ve already had. No matter what happens from now on though, I did manage to
get on national television as a comedian and had a job doing mornings at 97.9
‘The Loop’ in Chicago. In radio, that’s the big leagues as well.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>Not many ever make it to one of those much less both, but the key is to
stay there and carve out a career. I had a cup of coffee but that was it. So
far. Maybe that will be it. Maybe not. We’ll see.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-f175Tn3T1jw/U9W9jTwmlII/AAAAAAAACC0/NdbZLHqrdEA/s1600/cup+of+coffee.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-f175Tn3T1jw/U9W9jTwmlII/AAAAAAAACC0/NdbZLHqrdEA/s1600/cup+of+coffee.jpg" height="239" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Success in show business requires more than just a cup of coffee on national television. One has to make a mark - and that's a LOT harder than it sounds.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-11622738444478106922014-07-25T07:27:00.001-07:002014-07-25T07:27:15.362-07:00Entrepreneurial Evolution<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Monday July 21<sup>st</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Like it or not, a whole lot of us are going to have to get
more entrepreneurial in a hurry. I have been interested in having my own
business ever since I can remember, but it always took a back seat to being a
comedian. It’s only been recently that I’ve understood that comedy IS a
business.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What a dummy I’ve been, but it’s not too late to change. I always use
the great James Gregory from Atlanta as the gold standard of comedians that
understand the business side best, and I have yet to run into anyone better.
The only close horse in the race is Heywood Banks, and then all of the rest of
us are sliding around in a giant mud pit hoping to find a couple of straggling
nickels.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There are a lot of stellar business people in the comedy field in Los
Angeles, but I am thinking of road dogs like me. James figured it out early,
and has been consistently at the top of the game for decades. Heywood has done
well for himself too, and I respect both those guys enormously.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If they’re not natural entrepreneurs, they sure have worked hard at
fooling everyone. They are both extremely hard workers, and it is no accident
either one of them has achieved their success. They have handled their business
well, and didn’t choose to play the Hollywood roulette game.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>These are two shining examples of entrepreneurs in the comedy game, but
I’m talking of life in general. Ma and Pa public are broke, and there’s no sign
of relief in sight. They can either get out there are start some kind of a
business or they can learn to like cat food. Times are excruciating.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My grandfather used to tell me horror stories about The Great
Depression, and from all he said it wasn’t that great. He was forced to become
an entrepreneur, and he did just about anything he could get involved in to try
and feed his family. According to both Grandma and Gramps, it was nothing to
joke about. Everyone was tense, and nobody had any clue if it would ever get
better.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, it looks like history is repeating itself after all. The whole
country is broke, and 99.999% of us can use some extra cash right about now.
For most of us it’s not extra either – it’s all we’ve got. Prices of food and
gas and everything else are rising steadily, and nobody I know is doing at
least halfway decently much less kicking ass. Life is rather bleak, but there
has to be a solution.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>Reading about The Great Depression, there were people that made fortunes
for the ages. There are people doing it today as well, but they were rich to
start with. The rich truly are getting richer but I don’t see how I can get any
poorer. I’m barely hanging on, and it’s not how I want to live.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>It’s been a constant struggle to keep the bills paid, and the
distraction that is saps my creativity for projects I want to do. I did get a
couple of very generous gifts, but I used that money to erase a hefty credit
card bill and stop the bleeding of that insane interest rate. Now I am right at
zero.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>That doesn’t mean some emergency couldn’t wipe me out again, and I am
still dangling by the thinnest of threads. I don’t think a job alone will be
the long term solution. I will have to earn my own fortune, as there is nobody
that’s going to leave me theirs. A lot of others share this scenario and we all
have choices to make. The law of the jungle is adapt or die. It’s not “like it
was”, and it’s not going to be any time soon. Being an entrepreneur is in my
future, so I may as well like it.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fyMN_tL45c4/U9JokVsKP_I/AAAAAAAACCU/9OLL28Vapp4/s1600/entrepreneur.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fyMN_tL45c4/U9JokVsKP_I/AAAAAAAACCU/9OLL28Vapp4/s1600/entrepreneur.jpg" height="320" width="277" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tough times often force people to become entrepreneurs against their will. I am going along willingly.</td></tr>
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<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-10CMnuhxxJY/U9JomaiJI3I/AAAAAAAACCc/7LBbSetOtCw/s1600/james+gregory.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-10CMnuhxxJY/U9JomaiJI3I/AAAAAAAACCc/7LBbSetOtCw/s1600/james+gregory.jpg" height="273" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My friend James Gregory in Atlanta is the gold standard bearer for road comedian entrepreneurialism. He is the KING. www.funniestman.com</td></tr>
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<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-7BhF0S7Fui4/U9Jon7UDbJI/AAAAAAAACCk/q7OB03oRYmk/s1600/heywood+banks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-7BhF0S7Fui4/U9Jon7UDbJI/AAAAAAAACCk/q7OB03oRYmk/s1600/heywood+banks.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Another friend Heywood Banks is far from a slouch himself. He has always had a solid grasp on the business aspect. www.heywoodbanks.com</td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-86973674783374446962014-07-25T06:50:00.000-07:002014-07-25T06:50:49.019-07:00Flea-ing The Scene<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Sunday July 20<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Wilmot, WI</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There’s a flea market that’s now a lot farther than it used
to be from where I lived, but if I have time on a Sunday I’ll still make the
drive. It’s a ski hill in Wilmot, WI which is really close to the Illinois
state line, and having a flea market in summer is a great way to make use of
their space.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I discovered it last year, and even though it’s not that great I still
go at least a couple of times a month to if nothing else get in an exercise
walk. It’s always an enlightening education to soak in the human freak show at
any flea market, and I look at my $1 admission as really cheap tuition. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My main goal is to scope out a product I think I can sell myself. I
realize nothing is easy, but I sure don’t want to be doing what 99% of the
vendors are doing. Most of them pack up some kind of truck or trailer with a
random collection of useless crap I wouldn’t take for free. Why do that?</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The grunt work alone of setting up and tearing down couldn’t begin to
come close to any profit that may possibly be brought in. I can’t believe some
of the flat out junk some people put out for sale. What are the chances someone
will come along and need a left front fender for a ’67 Buick Wildcat or a pool
table with a scratched felt? Wouldn’t it be a lot smarter to just bring
pictures?</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If I would happen to be looking for a used pool table, I wouldn’t think
to look at a flea market in Wilmot, WI – or anywhere else. But I see people
week after week with displays that make my eyes hurt to look at them. It
reminds me of my Grandfather and father, and I want to set it ablaze.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My grandfather, grandmother, father and uncle were all borderline
hoarders. They all had a big problem throwing anything away, and then they all
died and everyone else had to clean up all of their messes. I vowed I never
wanted to be like that, and I intend to keep my word. I’m not going to put
anyone through that kind of hell when I croak. I want all my possessions to fit
into a bag.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The reason I go to flea markets is not to buy something for .95 and hope
I can sell it for $1.50. I want to see how and what the public buys – if
anything. Times are getting tighter by the minute and not many of us have a
pocket full of disposable income. I’ll bet the vendors are all hurting.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Collectibles as a whole are going through the floor. I’ve been wheeling
and dealing sports stuff for years, mainly to give me something to do. That
business is occupying the bottom of the toilet, along with stamps, coins and
especially Beanie Babies. What a waste of time that stupid fad was.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Come to think of it, they’re all pretty stupid. Sports cards are
basically pictures of sweaty men. That may be popular at a bath house
somewhere, but as far as contributing to society it really has no lasting
value. It’s kind of fun to collect, but when life gets hard who has time for
any hobbies?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My only ‘hobby’ at the moment is trying to pay bills for another month
and keep my aging car on the road. Trying to track down a three legged albino
porcupine Beanie Baby is a luxury I just can’t indulge myself with right now.
And if I could, I wouldn’t go hunting for it at a flea market.</span></div>
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</span>Still, I enjoy walking in the fresh air and taking in the sights which
are many. I have no idea of what I would ever sell, but maybe I’ll think of
something. Whatever it is, it won’t be a pool table.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mpx-A5Yt-qE/U9JcaVev3GI/AAAAAAAACCA/J-eNpp0ZzRo/s1600/flea+market.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mpx-A5Yt-qE/U9JcaVev3GI/AAAAAAAACCA/J-eNpp0ZzRo/s1600/flea+market.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Flea markets can be both entertaining and educational - but finding a real bargain is rare.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-64965830610867978332014-07-23T12:52:00.001-07:002014-07-23T12:52:28.502-07:00My Favorite Venue<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Saturday July 19<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Milwaukee, WI</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Ahhh…nothing is as thoroughly refreshing as an oasis in the
desert. Tonight I was booked for a pair of shows at my all time favorite
performance venue which is The Northern Lights Theatre at Potawatomi Casino in Milwaukee.
I love everything about the place, and I’d work there anytime.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The stage is enormous, the sound and lights are always perfect, and the
hometown audience is primed. I can talk to them like nowhere else, because I
grew up in Milwaukee and know exactly what buttons to push. I can use
references I can’t use anywhere else, and it is total creative bliss.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Another reason I like working there is the friendly staff. Bob Rech is
in charge, and everybody from him on down treats me like a big star. I treat
them well too, but I do that everywhere. That’s how I think everyone should be,
but it doesn’t always go down that way. I feel totally at home.</span></div>
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</span>Tonight I wasn’t hired to do my “Schlitz Happened!” show about growing
up in Milwaukee, so I kept it separate and just did my regular standup comedy
show. I have enough material to divide it up, and I have always been one to
switch things around depending on the individual audience.</span></div>
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</span>I’m rarely if ever nervous before any show, but tonight I admit there
was a knot in my stomach because my sister Tammy and her husband Jake came out
to see the early show. I had a difficult time coming up with the last time
Tammy saw me, and it has to be more than 25 years. Jake had never seen me
perform ever, and I wanted to have a good show just so they’d have a good time.</span></div>
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</span>We went out for dinner before the show, and met up with my cousin Wendy
and her childhood friend Mary Jo. Tammy and Wendy had never met, and I was a
nervous host there too because I wanted it to go well. The last thing I needed
would be any family tension, but there wasn’t a bit.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Wendy is a super sweetheart, and has supported me for years. She and
Tammy were fine, and we had a relaxing meal before they went to gamble for a
while before the show. Cary Ruby was the opening act, and she joined us for
dinner. I didn’t expect any problems from her, and didn’t have any. All of us
got along, and it went exactly how it was supposed to go. I was SO relieved. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The early show audience wasn’t horrible, but it wasn’t great either.
Summer shows are always light, and the 7pm starting time can be a factor too. I
was still able to get them going, but I have had much better audiences. Tammy
and Jake thought it was great, and so did Wendy. That’s the main concern I had,
and I’m always ultra hard on myself and set high standards. I want to please.</span></div>
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</span>Of course the second show was a whole lot better, but that’s how it
usually goes. When there’s anybody that need to be impressed, the show rarely
delivers – at least in my mind. When it’s just another show with nobody I know
in the crowd, that’s when it rocks. Those people were laughers and we all had a
blast. When that room is rocking, there isn’t any place like it. I adore that
space.</span></div>
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</span>If it were up to me, I would work there 52 weeks a year. I would perform
“Schlitz Happened!” and build my legend like Danny Gans did at his theatre in
The Mirage in Las Vegas. It doesn’t even have to be in the Northern Lights
Theatre, even though I fit perfectly there. A smaller room would be fine, as
long as the hot audiences keep showing up. I was born to work there. Literally.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-5k47UIPU_Lo/U9ASPoG_hGI/AAAAAAAACBs/vuvPwgfOFJM/s1600/Northern+Lights+Theatre.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-5k47UIPU_Lo/U9ASPoG_hGI/AAAAAAAACBs/vuvPwgfOFJM/s1600/Northern+Lights+Theatre.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I can't think of a more ideal venue for standup comedy than Northern Lights Theatre at Potawatomi Casino in Milwaukee. It's my favorite venue ever. www.paysbig.com </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-55533659901436408992014-07-23T12:40:00.001-07:002014-07-23T12:40:32.426-07:00An Extended Mess<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Friday July 18<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">My life is an extended mess, and I don’t know how to fix it.
It’s not messy like a lot of people, and in fact my mess is pretty boring.
There are no drug or alcohol addictions or cheating on my pregnant wife with a
secretary. But it’s still there. A mess is a mess, and they’re a bitch to
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am flopping around desperately like a fish in a boat, with a giant
hook in my mouth. My eyes are bugged out and I’m suffocating - with water just
inches away. If someone would remove the hook and toss me back in the water, I
would have a chance to start over. I would like that chance.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
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</span>The hook in my mouth is being an entertainer. I have given up everything
else in order to attain a skill level most never come close to, but it has put
me in an unstable financial position. I can no longer earn a living like I have
all of my adult life and my eyes are bugging out. I’m suffocating.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But water is just inches away. All it would take to turn my life around
is one phone call with an extended run of bookings somewhere. It could be
comedy clubs, casinos, cruise ships colleges or I could write for a TV show. I
could also do radio. It’s not like I’m a total zero. I have a skill set.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The skill set I have is very specialized, and those that are at the top
end of the scale are hauling in enormous bank. I don’t need that right now
quite honestly. I’d be thrilled with medium money on a steady basis, but
entertainment is a feast or famine game. I am smack dab amidst a famine.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There are few if any entertainers that don’t experience this at some
point, but many have a nest egg put away to fall back on during the lean times.
I had one started, and a nice one at that. Then I had a “worst case scenario”
pop up in 2011 and health problems cleaned out every last nickel.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This was after getting blasted out of a radio gig in 2004 that would
have paid great money and offered full insurance benefits so the crisis in 2011
wouldn’t have been nearly as devastating as it was. But it was. And ever since
then I have been watching everything I have worked so hard for for so long dry
up in front of my eyes. I know I’m not the only one suffering, but it’s still a
mess.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>How does one manage to clean up a life mess? It usually takes a while
for one to develop, and it can’t be taken away in one fell swoop – even though
that’s what most of us expect. It’s like the dieter that took a lifetime to put
on that extra 100 pounds, but expects to take it all off in a week.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s not realistic, and in fact it’s dangerous to even try. There has to
be a slow steady battle plan in place, and it’s neither pleasant nor easy. But
that’s what it takes to achieve desired results, and it gets harder as one gets
older because so many other things pop up and become obstacles also.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve got so many problems right now I have no idea where to start. I do
a little something every day on as many as I can, but then I look at how high
the mountain is and I lose hope. What’s the solution? I sure wish I knew. A
steady income would make things a lot easier, but how to get it?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m working on getting a resume out to ‘normal’ jobs, but I can’t lie.
My heart isn’t in it. I need stability, but I sure don’t want to do it this
way. Landing another radio gig that lasts several years would be ideal, but who
is passing those out these days? Nobody. Back to cleaning up my mess. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GUyjSqWe0Ps/U9APjiw5XQI/AAAAAAAACBg/is_Om7yiDHU/s1600/fish+out+of+water.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GUyjSqWe0Ps/U9APjiw5XQI/AAAAAAAACBg/is_Om7yiDHU/s1600/fish+out+of+water.jpg" height="208" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sometimes I feel like a fish at the bottom of the boat - with water just inches away.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-45072831853926891632014-07-22T12:11:00.002-07:002014-07-22T12:11:36.965-07:00Scrabble Babble<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Thursday July 17<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I
think I am finally ready for old age – that or a long prison term. I have found
the activity that is going to keep my brain occupied for the rest of my days on
this out of control little planet. I’m hooked for life, and if there’s a rehab program
I don’t want to participate. “It” is online Scrabble.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have loved words and word games since my earliest
memory. My grandfather would work on the daily crossword puzzle in the newspaper,
and as I got older I would help – or at least make an effort. I didn’t solve many
clues at first, but in time I got better and learned to enjoy the process.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Gramps
never played Scrabble, but I had an uncle that introduced me to it at a young age
albeit under unusual circumstances. My wacky aunt would always want to play, and
she was a piece of work to say the least. She eventually caused us to bend the rules,
and allow for trading of letters.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sure that’s not the first time additional homemade
rules have been implemented to a board game, but even that didn’t help my Aunt Charlene.
She would always find a way to get into a big argument with my uncle, and it put
everybody on edge. Still, I grew to adore the game anyway.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had never heard of a Scrabble club before I moved
to Lansing, MI in 1990 to take my first job in radio, but I was fascinated with
the idea. The club met on Saturday mornings, with most of the members being women
quite a bit older than me. I was 26 then, and they saw me as fresh meat.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They would bring assorted home baked goodies to
share with the group, and many would bring craft projects to knit or crochet during
the games. On the surface they didn’t look like a school of bloodthirsty sharks,
but then I’d sit down and get shredded flesh handed to me week after week. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wow, were they cold blooded. They would beat me
like Ike Turner beat Tina, and never break a sweat. They’d keep on knitting and
crocheting, and the grandmotherly smile would never leave their face for a second.
Try as I might, I don’t think I ever won even one game. They crushed me.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I only went a few times, but I had a fresh respect
for how much I needed to learn and how good someone could get at a game I thought
I was already good at. They were on a level I hadn’t even conceived of, but it also
made me want to improve. I have played whenever I could since then.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t believe it took me this long to discover
there was an entire online community of players, but I have now become one of them.
I am hooked. It’s only been a couple of months, but I can’t see myself ever getting
sick of playing. I do it whenever it’s convenient, and I don’t have to play an entire
game if I don’t want to. But if I do, I can play as many games as I want at a single
time.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just like with the Scrabble club in Lansing, at
first I was finding myself getting torched with an alarming degree of regularity.
It was discouraging, but I knew I’d get better if I hung in there and that’s what
I’ve done. Now I’m starting to win games regularly, and I can feel myself improving.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My two most regular opponents have been Bill Gorgo
and Kristie Dickinson. They are terrific players that consistently kicked me around
for weeks, but now I’m starting to win a few and they don’t like it. It’s a super
challenge, and I’m never bored. I have found my passion for the future.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-CfOuVxuzmSo/U863RcEZ2II/AAAAAAAACBQ/ufpB8YF9cOs/s1600/scrabble.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-CfOuVxuzmSo/U863RcEZ2II/AAAAAAAACBQ/ufpB8YF9cOs/s1600/scrabble.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Anybody want to play Scrabble online? I'm hooked. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-79866280469785177982014-07-21T13:48:00.002-07:002014-07-21T13:48:56.379-07:00Bus Dreams<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Wednesday July 16<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">One of a large laundry list of assorted oddities in my life
I have never been able to figure out is a recurring dream I have had for
decades. I have told it in detail to several dream interpreters that I have run
across both on the radio and in private, but nobody has given me a definitive
answer.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In my dream, I am walking through an unidentified city. It is almost
always at night, and I find an abandoned city bus parked with the motor running
and lights on. I get on the bus, sit myself in the driver’s seat and proceed to
start driving along a route that somehow I already know by heart.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I stop and pick passengers up, and nobody ever questions anything. I
will exchange banter with many of the people that get on, and even answer
questions they have about directions. It’s a very realistic experience, and I
can totally feel that big bus steering wheel in my hands as I’m driving.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s never a school bus or Greyhound, and it’s never out in the sticks.
It’s always a city bus in a city environment with big buildings around me and
lots of traffic. I know exactly how to operate everything, and I consciously
check my mirrors and use turn signals. It’s a detailed experience.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The funny thing is, I have never driven anything close to a bus in my
life. I did own a hearse a long time ago, but I didn’t drive it very much. It
was basically a gimmick I used to advertise my comedy. I had “Die Laughing with
Comedian Dobie Maxwell” painted on the side, and I parked it in a friend’s
driveway that lived on a busy street. It was more of a billboard than anything
else.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I only wish I could have as vividly detailed dreams about being a
special guest at the Playboy mansion, but that has never happened even once.
These bus dreams have been going on for most of my adult life, and I’ll be
dipped in diesel fuel if I can figure out why. But it’s not unpleasant.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I did happen to ride the city bus quite a bit while growing up in
Milwaukee, but there’s no way it should have buried itself that deeply into my
psyche that I still have such vivid dreams about it today. I have never charted
how often this dream occurs, but I’d say a couple of times each year.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Last night it happened again, and I have to admit I enjoyed it. I wasn’t
naked behind the wheel or anything like that, and once again I knew exactly
what I was doing and where I was going on my route. If I had that kind of confidence
and vision in real life, I would be a superstar by now.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The only other recurring dream I still have is about trying to be a
baseball pitcher. I show up at a tryout camp somewhere, and try to act like I
belong there. I get on the mound and start to throw and before long there are scouts
standing around asking me questions. Again, everything is vivid.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once in a while the procedure will take place at
an actual stadium although I can rarely identify which. Sometimes it’s Wrigley Field.
Other times it’s Comiskey Park or the old County Stadium in Milwaukee. Most times
it’s just your random run of the mill stadium, but it’s always packed.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Between innings I get to go out there and show
everybody what I have left in the tank. I give it all I have, and then they ask
me to join them in the broadcast booth. Again, I have no idea why it happens, but
it’s never unpleasant. Where’s Sigmund Freud when you need him? I need answers. </span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FxtOu9swXqM/U818kWw_SqI/AAAAAAAACBA/MJSH_t8uSNk/s1600/city+bus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FxtOu9swXqM/U818kWw_SqI/AAAAAAAACBA/MJSH_t8uSNk/s1600/city+bus.jpg" height="239" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">If my life dreams could match my bus dreams, I would be an unbelievable success. </td></tr>
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<br /></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-23874245569759457622014-07-19T10:16:00.002-07:002014-07-19T10:16:53.089-07:00Milwaukee Mingling<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Wednesday July 15<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Milwaukee, WI</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I took a trip home to Milwaukee today, and it turned into a
mini whirlwind tour. With the price of gas where it is I think we all have to
plan our trips these days. I squeezed as much into a single day as I could, and
it was productive. I challenge anyone to pack as much into one day as I did.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My first stop was Miss Katie’s Diner to see my friend Lynn Miner. Lynn
is one of my biggest supporters, and an outstanding human being. He’s a
magician among many other things, and he’s looking to do that full time after a
hugely successful career as a grant seeker all over the world.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I can help Lynn with adding jokes to his act, but he helps me even more.
He’s got a lifetime of experience in making business plans, and is mentoring me
in what I’m doing. It’s a win/win for all parties, and I always look forward to
meeting up with him. We complement each other well.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After lunch I stopped at the Milwaukee County Courthouse and then City
Hall to check out the job openings of all things. I always said I’d never move
back to Milwaukee, but if I had a reason to – like a decent job – I totally
would. The former demons that used to haunt me are now dead.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I hated going back to Milwaukee because of so many bad memories. Now
that I’ve gotten back in touch with my siblings, it has healed a lot of those
wounds. None of them happen to live there anymore, but that’s where we were
born and raised. Milwaukee will always be part of our DNA.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I don’t know if I’ll get a job or not, but it won’t hurt to sniff around
and see what’s available. If I could land a nice gig with benefits, I can still
do my “Schlitz Happened!” show around the state and continue performing and
teaching comedy classes for Zanies in Chicago so life would be ok.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Since I was downtown already, I decided to take a lap through the
Milwaukee Public Museum. It had been years since I did that, but I had some
time so I decided to make the investment. I had no idea ticket prices have
skyrocketed to $15, but by the time I got to the window it was too late.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I hadn’t planned on spending $15, but it really is an outstanding museum
so I bit the bullet and I’m glad I did. There were a lot of exhibits I still
remember from my childhood along with many new things I had never seen before.
I enjoyed every minute of it, and it was interesting to observe all the kids
that were there on class field trips just like I went on when I was that age. It
was fun.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After that I was able to squeeze in a couple of thrift stores, but
didn’t find any ancient artifacts I could resell for huge profits. If VHS tapes
ever come back, I know where to load up. Other than that, it was a bunch of
junk I wouldn’t take for free. Still, it’s fun to hunt and I enjoyed the stops.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I was listening to my friend Steve ‘The Homer’ True on AM 540 ESPN Radio
and he was on a live remote broadcast at a Pick n’ Save grocery store. He was
trying to get donations for the local Hunger Task Force and was flipping coins
to donate $100. If a listener won, Homer would pay.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>If Homer won, the listener donated. Homer has always supported anything
I ever did, and I was glad to stop and flip the coin. I lost of course, but
that’s the legend of Mr. Lucky. I received a big plug on the air, and donated
to a worthy cause. Milwaukee will always be home, so why fight it? </span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-S6uGKyxkCTQ/U8qn34wvbTI/AAAAAAAACAw/nu-GzL8oF5w/s1600/Milwaukee.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-S6uGKyxkCTQ/U8qn34wvbTI/AAAAAAAACAw/nu-GzL8oF5w/s1600/Milwaukee.jpg" height="239" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Milwaukee will always be my home town - warts and all. Why not embrace it?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-33208852167897199912014-07-19T09:27:00.000-07:002014-07-19T09:27:20.891-07:00No Complaints<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tuesday July 15<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I am by nature a complainer. I think most comedians are to
some degree, and that’s a large part of why many of us are attracted to the
concept of comedy in the first place. Our minds tend to go that way anyway, so
why not pick apart life in general and point out the flaws and absurdities? </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s hilarious when done right, and I became skilled at it early. I used
to pick apart school lunch every day in grade school, just because I thought it
was funny. It was funny, at least to the kids in my class. I used to get them
rolling to the point they almost choked on the food, and that’s about the best
compliment I could ever imagine. Killing a kid would have made me a comedy
legend.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Then one day out of the blue one of the lunch ladies got in my face and
said she was sick of my smart mouth and told me to shut it once and for all.
She said how hard they worked every day on a limited budget to feed us, and
then I’d walk in and get all the kids laughing. She said it hurt all the
kitchen employees, and they dreaded seeing me enter into the cafeteria. I felt
like a giant ass. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I didn’t realize that my bitching had hurt those ladies, and that day I
walked in the kitchen and said I was sorry to each and every one of them. I
told them I was only trying to get the other kids to laugh, and I didn’t
realize that I was hurting their feelings. I don’t know if they believed me at
the time, but I absolutely meant it. I still do. From that day forward I never
made another joke.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Granted, I’ve done jokes about school lunch on stage but that was
decades later and in another state. The chances of any of those ladies being at
my show would be astronomical. My luck they would be having a convention or
reunion in the town I was playing, and I’d infuriate them again.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I often use this very forum to tee off on something or someone that
grinds my gonads, and I’m sure I’ve turned people off with that too. I would
love to paint a perpetually sunny picture of the world, but from my vantage
point I just don’t see it. There are circumstances that befuddle me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A big one I am painfully reminded of every day is my roommate Sheri.
What a horrible hand she has been dealt off the bottom of life’s deck, and it
sickens me to see all the pain and suffering she is enduring. She is out of the
hospital after her stroke on New Year’s Eve, but her life is hell.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am delighted that we were able to pull off a benefit comedy show for
her, and I see the direct result of it every day. She has a chair lift that
takes her up and down some stairs, and our event is what paid for it. Most of
us don’t need to think twice about going up or down any single flight of
stairs, but Sheri can’t do that by herself anymore. It’s a major deal for her
just to get out of bed.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She has nurses that come over on most days and help her do the simplest
things, and she has to take all kinds of medication that is very expensive.
She’s on disability, and some of her medicine comes out of that. My rent money
really helps her, and I do all I can to help her in any way I can.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s extremely sad all around, and sometimes I look at her situation and
wonder why somebody so nice has to suffer such a cruel fate. Sheri is a kind
soul and would never hurt a baby flea. I’ve known her twenty years, and feel an
obligation to help. Yet through all this mess I’ve yet to hear Sheri complain
even once. I’d bet few of us could take it so well. It’s time to shut my yap.
Again.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-P_cwracYl84/U8qcKrVByLI/AAAAAAAACAg/ObTMi6A-DR4/s1600/complaints.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-P_cwracYl84/U8qcKrVByLI/AAAAAAAACAg/ObTMi6A-DR4/s1600/complaints.jpg" height="320" width="238" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It's far too easy to complain about almost anything. That's a habit I need to break yesterday.</td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-86260670840911737602014-07-15T14:04:00.000-07:002014-07-15T14:04:13.944-07:00Social Intercourse<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Monday July 14<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been feeling more than
pretty good of late, and attempting to relax and enjoy the charms of summer.
It’s been unbelievably slow on the business side, but jam packed with friends
calling and asking to get together. My greatest resource has always been my
long list of amazing friends, and that list gets longer and sweeter with time.
If I did nothing else in life, I met some nice folks.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>To have friends one must be a friend, and that’s where I’m having some
issues. I don’t have all the time I’d like to hang out and visit, and that
bothers me. I’ve always been one to hang out with someone because I like that
person, not for what they can do for me. Unfortunately, that’s not the smart
way to do things in a business sense. Social climbing is necessary, at least on
some level.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have always had a hard time hiding my disdain for someone I don’t care
for. I realize nobody likes everybody, and there are more than a few that don’t
like me either. I have no problem with that, except when those people are
friendly to my face but then stab me in the back when I leave.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Why be two faced? Just stay away, and we’ll both be better off. I don’t
have time for all of the good friends I have now, so why would I waste even one
second with somebody that doesn’t like me? It makes perfect sense to me, but
that’s not how business operates. I need to mingle more.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I think we all tend to stay with who is familiar in many areas of our
lives, but branching out is absolutely essential in today’s world. Making new
contacts can be a job in itself, but maintaining them is even harder. There are
only so many lunches in one’s life, and how many times have we all said “Let’s
get together soon,” but never do. Even if intentions are sincere, it’s just not
easy.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have been going over my master list of contacts, and I am WAY overdue
to get in touch with a lot of people I really like. It could be a phone call or
email, but I’d much rather meet up face to face if possible – even though
they’re scattered all over the country and beyond. It’s a huge list.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>We all have lives to live and I get that, but this year has been extra
hard on losing many people I knew but hadn’t contacted in a long time. John
Pinette is a prime example. It’s not like we were thick as thieves, but we knew
each other well enough that whenever we crossed paths it was fun to see each
other. We worked together enough times where we’d built up some positive
history.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve got literally hundreds of comedians like that scattered all over
the planet, not to mention a ton of friends I made in radio, professional
wrestling, trading sports cards and just going through life in general. It’s
important to me to stay in contact with as many as I can, even though I can’t
come close to keeping current with everyone. Who can? If someone else can do
it, major kudos.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>I just don’t have enough time, and it’s getting worse. I get up early,
work all day, stay up a lot later than I probably should, drop off to sleep and
then start it all over again. I make a hell of an effort if I say so myself,
but I still fall painfully short. I’m going to have to rearrange yet again.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>Idiots and/or scumbags have zero place in my life. Baseball gives three
strikes, but I don’t have that kind of patience at this point. I’ll give one
strike, and then you’re out. There are far too many good people I want to hang
with. I don’t wish the losers harm - I just wish them away from me. </span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-90827433501112812102014-07-14T05:18:00.002-07:002014-07-14T05:18:24.524-07:00Keys To Happiness<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Sunday July 13<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Lake Villa, IL/Wauconda,
IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">If any inconvenience of modern life as we know it comes as
close to being as exasperating as losing one’s keys, wallet or cell phone, I
have yet to discover it. What a major hassle that is, and I have had it happen
so many times I lost count years ago. It’s a constant battle – at least for me.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Those three things are the easiest to lose, but the most difficult to
replace. Try as I might to get better, I am always setting one of those three
down somewhere and then forgetting where that is. Then I have to retrace my
steps and grope at straws trying to remember where I may have left it.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am constantly patting myself down before I leave most places checking
all pockets for “Keys, wallet, phone…keys, wallet phone” - over and over and
over again. I look like I’m performing a German folk dance wherever I go the
way I slap at myself checking for those three crucial items.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have tried to drill it into my skull like a mantra. “Keys, wallet,
phone…keys, wallet, phone. Phone, wallet, keys…phone, wallet, keys…wallet,
phone, keys…wallet, phone, keys.” You get the idea. There aren’t that many
possible combinations, but whatever it takes I’m willing to do.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have successfully managed to lose all three more than once, but
strangely enough never all at the same time. I have tried to protect myself at
least a little by having extra car ignition and post office box keys made which
I keep in my wallet. I also have about a half a dozen plastic thingies from
various grocery stores and gas stations that go on my key ring to identify it
when it’s lost.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Wouldn’t you know it, a couple of days ago I happened to lose my keys –
again. I discovered it on my way out the door in a hurry, but I didn’t think
much of it as I was carrying my trusty spare car key in my wallet. I figured I
must have left it in a pair of pants or something, and would find it later.
Where I’m living there’s no need for any house keys, as I use an automatic
garage door.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A couple of days went by, and I had no idea where those keys were. I
scoured every inch of my room, my car, the garage and everywhere else I could
think of. I had no idea where I might have left them, and I tried to retrace my
steps in my head and remember the last place I still had them.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It occurred to me that at least two of the plastic thingies on the key
ring were no longer good as Dominick’s grocery store closed all their stores
recently and Jewel no longer has a discount card program. I couldn’t remember
the other cards I had, but I knew there were a few. I just hoped the person
that found them would drop them into a mailbox and I’d have a chance to get
them back.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I had a late breakfast this morning with my friend Mike Land in Lake,
Villa, IL. He lives close by, and attends church on Sunday mornings. I have my
post office box in Lake Villa, so I need to go there at least once a week and
get my mail. We’ve been making Sunday breakfasts a tradition. I was distracted
the entire meal as I tried to recall where I left those damn keys. I was stumped.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the way home I passed a Chinese restaurant I
stopped at to pick up lunch for my roommate last week in Wauconda, IL and may have
left them there. I crossed my fingers, toes and one eye as I walked in to ask. BINGO!
There they were!! The feeling of sheer joy shot through my veins like heroin, and
I promised myself I’ll never lose them again. Until next time. I’m still an idiot.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wGM_xNry4Qs/U8PKXHnPbWI/AAAAAAAACAA/u0zAhVTs4I4/s1600/keys.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wGM_xNry4Qs/U8PKXHnPbWI/AAAAAAAACAA/u0zAhVTs4I4/s1600/keys.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A set of keys are some of the easiest things to lose - and the most difficult to replace. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<br /></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-47508840873076141002014-07-13T04:02:00.000-07:002014-07-13T04:02:30.373-07:00Just Cos<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Saturday July 12<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Today is Bill Cosby’s 77<sup>th</sup> birthday, and I challenge
anybody to name a 20<sup>th</sup> century entertainer that has touched more people
in a positive way. I sure can’t, and if there is one not only does my hat go off
to that person, I will include my head along with it. Bill Cosby stands alone at
the top.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My grandfather took me to see him when I was about
14. I will admit I wasn’t thrilled about it at first, mainly because I was a 14
year old know it all punk and didn’t think it would be any fun to have to sit through
something like that. Looking back, I clearly see what a flaming idiot I was.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember getting to the Performing Arts Center
in Milwaukee with Gramps early and finding our seats. All that was on the stage
was a microphone in a stand, and I remember experiencing an immediate sense of disappointment.
I don’t know what I had expected, but it was more than that.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To make it worse, there was an opening act we had
to sit through. It was a piano player named Walt Michaels. I don’t know why I remember
his name all these years later, but I do. He wasn’t bad, and in fact he was unbelievably
good – but I was 14 and knew everything about everything.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then Bill Cosby came out and within ten minutes
both Gramps and I were bent over clutching our sides with laughter. I’ve never seen
anything like it before or since. He proceeded to pound it out for an hour and a
half, and by the time the show ended the entire audience could not breathe.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was a fan from that day on, and I’ve never stopped.
Especially since I’ve done comedy – or at least a reasonable facsimile of it – for
so many years, my respect for what he has accomplished is enormous. His place in
the all time annals of standup comedy is in stone, but he’s not done yet.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And that’s not counting what he accomplished in
television. Fat Albert was a staple of the ‘70s on Saturday mornings, and I watched
it regularly as did millions of kids of my generation. After that he only came out
with the biggest sitcom of the ‘80s. Most mortal entertainer types would be thrilled
to be able to lay claim to any one of those things. Bill Cosby is more than a mere
mortal.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sure, he had a few movies that flamed out. So what?
Most of us never get even ONE chance to star in a movie and he got several. People
make jokes about “Leonard Part 6” and “Ghost Dad”, but who wouldn’t love to be made
fun of like that? If those are his worst problems, he’ll be fine.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been unbelievably fortunate to have met
more than a few legendary comedians in person from George Carlin to Richard Pryor
to Bill Hicks and others, but Bill Cosby is one I would still love to meet. I don’t
know what I’d say other than how much I love his work, but that’s enough.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wouldn’t consider myself a peer, as he’s pretty
much in a class by himself. I’m a lifelong fan though, along with millions of others
white and black, old and young, Northern and Southern and just about any other kind
of difference. Bill Cosby has made more people laugh than anyone else.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can anyone think of a higher honor than that? There
isn’t one. If he’s a dented can he sure does hide it well, but it wouldn’t surprise
me. We all are to some degree, but people like Bill Cosby do us all a favor and
make the ride a little more pleasant. What an amazing contribution he’s made.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VmaJZiaPby0/U8JnIOmgGwI/AAAAAAAAB_w/kYvswiJMs7w/s1600/bill+cosby.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VmaJZiaPby0/U8JnIOmgGwI/AAAAAAAAB_w/kYvswiJMs7w/s1600/bill+cosby.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Bill Cosby is still going strong at 77. What a truly legendary career he has had. Wow. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-66238642287426133762014-07-12T22:16:00.002-07:002014-07-12T22:16:42.697-07:00Right Place Right Time<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Friday July 11<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">One of the few standout highlights of my childhood that has successfully
stood the test of time is my extreme love of professional wrestling. It wasn’t so
much the actual wrestling itself as the dynamic personalities and charisma of the
wrestlers. I was fortunate to have seen some greats.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wrestling was a regional attraction for much of
the 20<sup>th</sup> century until Vince McMahon Jr. took over his father’s promotion
on the east coast and graduated it to a national and then international stage. Like
it or not – and none of the old school promoters did – McMahon changed the game.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The star attraction he used to build his empire
was Hulk Hogan, and together they created a big splash not only in the wrestling
world but in mainstream American culture of the ‘80s. Hogan is the only professional
wrestler to date to grace the cover of Sports Illustrated and that says a lot.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hulk Hogan became a household name during that
time, and Vince McMahon became wealthy beyond belief. Most casual fans of wrestling
accept as fact that Hogan was the greatest of his era, but in fact he just happened
to be in the right place at the right time. That’s the recipe for success.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hogan’s wrestling abilities have never been stellar,
but that doesn’t matter. His look combined with his persona and charisma were exactly
what the public was buying at that time. He nailed it. It was just like the Colonel
finding Elvis. That was another example of right place and right time.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For every Hogan or Elvis that hit pay dirt there
are countless others that never find the winning combo and are destined to languish
in either relative or total obscurity. One of those in wrestling was my childhood
super hero and fellow Milwaukeean Reggie Lisowski – aka “The Crusher”. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Crusher was the Midwest Hulk Hogan, even though
Hogan got his first big push working for Verne Gagne’s AWA based out of Minneapolis.
That was a major promotion in that era, and all kinds of great talent came through
there - and through my little black and white television set.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wrestling on TV then was basically a one hour commercial
for live matches, and it worked. It got me to spend my money, and I loved every
minute of it. The Crusher was my favorite, and the favorite of everyone else in
Milwaukee. He was the original bad ass, way before Chuck Norris.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Crusher was born on this day in 1926, and was
nearing the end of his illustrious run just as Vince McMahon was starting his. Crusher
and so many others that earned it never got to taste the mainstream adulation that
Hogan and many that came after him did. That’s just luck of the draw.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Crusher wasn’t born at the right time, and
there’s nothing anyone can do about that. It’s an unfair world, and some things
are beyond our control. Another great that got screwed in that way was “Superstar”
Billy Graham. I used to watch him as a kid, and he turned wrestling on its ear.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vince McMahon Jr. admits that if he were in charge
instead of his father that Superstar would have been Hulk Hogan ten years earlier.
But he wasn’t. And now Superstar Graham lives alone in obscurity, wondering what
could have – and should have – been. Life is what it is, and trying to figure it
out only causes frustration. The Crusher and Superstar are still big stars in my
book. </span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fAkE3BR9fak/U8IVuAYPnbI/AAAAAAAAB_Y/NGFJNRskwbI/s1600/The+Crusher.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fAkE3BR9fak/U8IVuAYPnbI/AAAAAAAAB_Y/NGFJNRskwbI/s1600/The+Crusher.jpg" height="320" width="249" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Crusher flexing one of his famous '100 Megaton Biceps'. He was THE wrestling attraction when I was a kid growing up in Milwaukee. "How 'bout dat?"</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AUpOCBZdXhY/U8IVu-K_-QI/AAAAAAAAB_c/2Ho7lrrkm_4/s1600/Superstar+Billy+Graham+%232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AUpOCBZdXhY/U8IVu-K_-QI/AAAAAAAAB_c/2Ho7lrrkm_4/s1600/Superstar+Billy+Graham+%232.jpg" height="320" width="255" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Superstar Billy Graham was ahead of his time. Even Vince McMahon admits it. He was Hulk Hogan long before Hogan, but he never got paid like it. Life just isn't fair.</td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-87075108267088742132014-07-10T20:39:00.001-07:002014-07-10T20:39:37.612-07:00Eleven Percent Genius<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Thursday July 10<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I read a quote one time that defined “genius”, and I wish
I’d have written it down. Usually I am a fastidious compiler of interesting quotes,
but that particular time I was not for whatever reason, and now I am at a loss
to find it anywhere. I found a lot of others in my search, but not that one.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe I didn’t read it, I heard it. I don’t recall, but the basic
message was “Talent is the ability to reach goals others can’t reach. Genius is
the ability to reach goals others can’t see.” I have no idea who may have said
it, but that’s not important. The message blew me away and still does.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I think there is at least some degree of genius in all of us, even
though we don’t always act like it. Stupid seems to have a stranglehold almost
everywhere, but occasionally bursts of genius slip out into the mainstream and
thumb their nose at the rest of the world. Oh, to be one of those few.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Genius is a title that is often thrown around freely but incorrectly –
especially by those without any of their own. Sometimes it’s a matter of
opinion, and there is room for doubt. Is Kanye West a true genius? Despite what
he may boldly claim, there would be those that may beg to differ. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I don’t want to get into it about him, as I can’t say I’ve heard even
one of his songs. His whole arrogant persona makes me puke, but that doesn’t
mean he’s not brilliant at what he does. Genius and humility don’t have to go
hand in hand, and I’m sure there are all kinds of personality types.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Would anyone debate that Stephen Hawking is a legitimate genius? But
would anyone want to trade places with him? I don’t think being a genius
guarantees happiness, and in fact it would be a hindrance. Most of the world
doesn’t operate on that level on a consistent basis, and never did.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I don’t think it takes an especially high level of genius to be
successful in life. Supposedly we only use about ten percent of our mind’s
potential. With all the mouth breathers walking around on a daily basis I find
that number to be extremely inflated, but I’ll use it for example purposes.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How much more brain power would anybody need to use to come out on top?
I say it would be eleven percent, but there would have to be a workable plan of
action in place and that plan would need to be executed. That’s where I’ve had
problems, and still do. There has to be a battle plan in place, and that’s
where the genius comes in. One needs to see the vision before anyone else does.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve had a clear vision in my head of what I wanted my life to be like
since I was a small child. Does that classify me as a genius? I guess that
would depend on who one would talk to, but since I have yet to be able to
execute my full vision in the real world that would be a resounding no. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The King of Uranus concept is something I have pictured in my head for
years, and I still have big plans to make that more of a reality. I have done
it in bits and pieces, but nowhere near to the degree where I pictured it –at
least not yet. I see it clearly in my own head, but it’s not executed.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Now I need to transfer that vision to as many others as I can. If enough
others see it along with me, I’ll be called genius. That’s a great title to be
referred to after one is dead. While still above ground, I’d much rather be
known as “rich”. I don’t need to be a full genius - just eleven percent.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-99HYyDxDeCA/U79cHds87OI/AAAAAAAAB_A/Z77_BbGtxUw/s1600/hawking.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-99HYyDxDeCA/U79cHds87OI/AAAAAAAAB_A/Z77_BbGtxUw/s1600/hawking.jpg" height="320" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">If you didn't happen to know who this person was, would you peg him to be what a typical genius looks like?</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-L_gxjs_5NPY/U79cV1-u_BI/AAAAAAAAB_I/x-oIpuKnOWI/s1600/King+of+Uranus+pic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-L_gxjs_5NPY/U79cV1-u_BI/AAAAAAAAB_I/x-oIpuKnOWI/s1600/King+of+Uranus+pic.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">What about this guy? Inspired madman or complete jackass?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</span></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-56713617844162694062014-07-10T20:21:00.001-07:002014-07-10T20:21:02.477-07:00Keeping SCORE<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Wednesday July 9<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Gurnee, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tonight I attended a free seminar on how to conduct business
online. It was given by a member of SCORE, which is a mentoring source for
small business. I had heard of this organization for a long time, and I
probably should have gotten myself involved a lot sooner than now. But I
didn’t.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I didn’t do a lot of things I now wish I would have, but who doesn’t
share that story? We could all fill our own life’s diary with the opportunities
we blew, but that’s not news. What’s important is what we do correctly, and
that’s what I intend to focus my energy on. The past is exactly that.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My pit crew Eric Feinendegen heard about this meeting that was held at a
library in Gurnee, IL where he lives. He asked if I felt like going, and I
jumped at it. He had never heard of this group but they’ve been around for
decades. It’s made up of volunteers who have business experience.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’d guess there were 40-50 in attendance, and most of them looked to be
very new at the whole idea of being an entrepreneur. The theme of tonight’s
presentation was setting up a web presence in order to do business, and how
important it is in today’s economy. It has become a necessity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The guy in charge was friendly enough, but his presentation skills
weren’t the greatest. I don’t mean any offense by that, as that’s not what his
field of expertise is. He was obviously a member of the business world his
entire life, and now in his retirement he’s reaching back to help others. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m grateful for any help I can get right about now, but I couldn’t help
thinking of how I could do presentations like this and blow people away. He had
no idea how to structure his talk, and he didn’t have a beginning or an end. He
just kind of started, and then talked until his time was up.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I don’t want to rip the guy, and he really did seem like a friendly
fellow. But if I had paid to be here, I would have been completely
disappointed. There was zero showmanship whatsoever, and it drove home not only
how crucial that is in all presentations but how I have a master’s degree.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Somebody somewhere needs someone that can make effective live
presentations, and I need to find them in a hurry. Comedy shows are great, but
by far not the only outlet for live presenting. I would gladly host events like
this if I were being paid, and it wouldn’t have to be all that much. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Eric and I have our work cut out for us. He’s a speaker himself, and has
won several awards in contests he’s entered. That would be the last thing I’d
want to do, but we can help each other get to where we both want to be. He’s
very good at organization, and we have been working together at getting me
better in that department. I still have a long way to go, but we’re making
progress.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I in turn can help him with his speeches, and eventually we’d like to
bring someone else in as a pit crew to keep things running smoothly. NOBODY is
able to do everything by themselves, and it’s smart business to consult someone
who has experience no matter who that is or what it’s for. </span></div>
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</span>Tonight we reached out to someone that has business experience –
something I can really use a hand with. It’s another step on the long journey
of becoming a self sufficient entrepreneur. I wish I’d done it a whole lot
sooner, but I didn’t. It’s too late for wishes. Action is all that matters now.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-2oYL3zx1vGE/U79X6LiPEuI/AAAAAAAAB-0/WN9zxREEGN8/s1600/score.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-2oYL3zx1vGE/U79X6LiPEuI/AAAAAAAAB-0/WN9zxREEGN8/s1600/score.jpg" height="116" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">SCORE is an organization that mentors small business. I could use a mentor right about now. </td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-82402482258364853272014-07-09T09:11:00.000-07:002014-07-09T09:11:06.453-07:00What Is Success?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tuesday July 8<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Island Lake, IL</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The mystery of the way life works never ceases to fascinate
me. On one hand, I’m having all of my dreams come true with my family after a
lifetime of utter hopelessness and loneliness. But on the other, I’m seeing my
career go absolutely nowhere after a lifetime of unbelievable sacrifice.</span></div>
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</span>Which would I rather have? Why can’t I have both? Does anyone have a
tight family bond and career success? I have to believe a lot of people do, and
I want to be one of them. But if I have to choose one, I’ll take it exactly how
it’s playing out. It’s giving me a power I’ve never had before.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>There is a major healing process taking place inside me, and I’ve never
felt better. It’s building on itself and creating a steady flow of positive
energy, just as it was a constant source of pain and suffering before. Chasing
the show business dream was a substitute for this, but it never worked.</span></div>
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</span>It’s like the difference between the best tanning booth there is vs. an
actual sunny beach. There is absolutely no comparison. The tanning booth is a
substitute for the real thing, and quite often a career in show business serves
the same purpose. I know it did for me, but this is so much better.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>Would I have jumped head first into the rusty meat grinder of the
entertainment business like I did had I had a tight bond with a family? I
honestly can’t say. Usually having weak family ties is what keeps a person from
turning back when the business gets tough. There are no alternatives.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That was definitely the case with me. I look back at all the dues I paid
and the crap I swallowed from bully bar owners and slimy bookers, and had I had
a loving family support structure I doubt I’d have lasted close to this long.
This can be a brutal business, and I don’t know how I survived.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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</span>Now it’s to the point where I’m not surviving, even though that’s not my
fault. It’s that way for just about everybody these days, and there are a lot
of miserable people out there that have paid a lifetime of dues just like I
have. There were never any guarantees anyone would be ‘successful’.<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></b></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">And
what exactly is ‘success’? It’s different for everybody, and after a lifetime
of thinking I’ve been a lowly bum I totally haven’t. I’ve accomplished a hell
of a lot considering the place I came from, and I should be extremely proud of
myself. But am I done? I don’t see why I have to be.</span></div>
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</span>I’ll be the first to admit I have made some gargantuan goofs career
wise. I’ve managed to piss off some people with power, but only on a certain
level. I’m not a bad person, and the minute I’d get any heat whatsoever I know
those people would come running to kiss my ass and book me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I used to really want to please those people and get bookings so I could
‘show’ others – mainly my family – that I was indeed worth something after all.
Well, now I don’t need to show anyone anything anymore and that has changed my
whole viewpoint on life. Now I’m doing it for all the right reasons, and I have
to believe the results will be better. And if they aren’t, that’s fine too.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>‘Getting famous’ can be a motivator for a lot of people because they
want to use it as a tool for revenge. That never has a happy ending. I want to
use it as a tool to help people however I can or to help raise awareness for
worthy causes. It’s taken a lifetime, but I’m finally starting to get it.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ucirLU_51QA/U71pHHyq5rI/AAAAAAAAB-c/jWwpcBvmq-k/s1600/success.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ucirLU_51QA/U71pHHyq5rI/AAAAAAAAB-c/jWwpcBvmq-k/s1600/success.jpg" height="239" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">What is success? Everyone's definition is different.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yAFTsf2H7kY/U71pZlvs1tI/AAAAAAAAB-o/dfFdS9hN5X0/s1600/hottie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yAFTsf2H7kY/U71pZlvs1tI/AAAAAAAAB-o/dfFdS9hN5X0/s1600/hottie.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I wonder what hers is?</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</span></div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6585830625719914561.post-5718451774306690192014-07-09T08:48:00.003-07:002014-07-09T08:48:45.480-07:00The Funniest Human<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Monday July 7<sup>th</sup>, 2014 – Milwaukee, WI</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">A shocking revelation for those that aren’t in the business
is that many professional comedians are not funny people in the least off
stage. It is mistakenly assumed that since we make our living on stage getting
audiences to laugh, it carries over into our personal lives and we’re always
‘on’.</span></div>
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</span>Nothing could be more ridiculous, but that’s what far too many think.
Dennis Miller referred to standup comedy as a “chimp trick”, and I see his
point. I’ve always referred to it as a craft, and a craft can only be acquired
through painstaking years of learning skills and putting them to use.</span></div>
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</span>There are countless comedians that have a natural flair for being funny
going in, but it still has to be polished and refined to a professional
standard. Quite often that painful process tends to be what drives a lot of the
funny out of those people, but if someone truly ‘has it’, it’s there for life.</span></div>
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</span>There are also countless others that ‘have it’ - but never even once
stand on a stage. My cousin Brett is one of those people. I would rank him up
there with any of the top comedians I have ever met or seen, and had he wanted
to he could have easily made his living doing what I have done. </span></div>
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</span>Instead, he chose to be a union carpenter. He’s very good at what he
does, but he faces many of the same issues I do with playing the politics game.
Like me he’s terrible at it and knows it – and he also tends to shoot off his
big mouth a lot like I do. We are definitely cut from the same cloth.</span></div>
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</span>That’s likely what makes him so funny. He’s sick, twisted, vicious and
unrelenting – and that’s a sincere compliment. Funny just flows through his
veins, and no matter how long it’s been since we’ve seen each other we can pick
it up from where we left off and get each other going again.</span></div>
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</span>There is no human nor animal on this planet that can make me laugh out
loud harder than Brett. Nobody. He knows my buttons, and when he hits one he
will not stop. He often makes me laugh so hard I think I’m going to suffocate
from a lack of oxygen – but afterward I feel SO cleansed.</span></div>
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</span>That’s what happened tonight as I drove to Milwaukee to have dinner with
Brett. We try to get together once a month if we can, but sometimes we’ll miss.
We both happened to be off tonight, so we enjoyed a rack of ribs at Famous
Dave’s which is one of our favorite spots and caught up. </span></div>
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</span>Brett and his father had about the same relationship me and mine did,
and we have all kinds of similar issues about it. We were around each other
growing up a lot more than I ever was with all of my siblings, so Brett is
basically the younger brother I never had. I can’t call him little, as he’s
about 6’4” with size 14 shoes. He could twist my head of like a bottle cap, but
he never would.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like my brother Larry, Brett is one of the kindest
souls I have ever met. He’s constantly giving of himself – and constantly getting
taken advantage of. I think it goes with the territory, but it’s a part of who he
is just like it is with Larry and me. We’re givers, and that’s what we do. Period.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get to enjoy Brett’s dark and warped sense of
humor all to myself, and it’s more precious than gold to me. I hope I have had that
effect on others, onstage and off. It feels SO good to laugh that hard, and he’s
the only one I can think of that can make me do it consistently. Now that’s a gift.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FPAjinl8Mzw/U71i7H9kxaI/AAAAAAAAB-Q/_mwfae0nxD4/s1600/funny+face.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FPAjinl8Mzw/U71i7H9kxaI/AAAAAAAAB-Q/_mwfae0nxD4/s1600/funny+face.jpg" height="246" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Who is the funniest person you can think of? It may - or may not - be a comedian. For me, it's my cousin Brett. He cracks me up!</td></tr>
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