Wednesday August 14th, 2013 – Fox Lake,
IL
One
of the most unpleasant not to mention energy draining facets of the
entertainment business is the constant attention that’s required to maintain a
booking schedule. I’ve never enjoyed it, but there’s no choice. If one wants to
be a professional comedian, the calendar needs to stay filled on a regular
basis. In theory, that doesn’t sound so difficult. In reality, it’s a constant
pain in the ass.
Today was a perfect example. The website
“Gig Masters” sent an email a few weeks back that a corporate gig was available
between Madison, WI and Milwaukee. I applied for it, and thought I had it. I
heard from the person who placed the inquiry, and she told me I was the main
finalist.
This person is not in the entertainment
business, and has no idea how it works. I received word a few days later they
were changing the date of the event to another date in October of this year. I
happen to have a fairly solid October, and couldn’t do it. The lady said they’d
love to have me, so I approached the booker for the date I had already booked
that conflicted with the new date.
The corporate show paid three times what I
was scheduled to make for the entire weekend at a club, but I really like
working that particular club and I’ve had it booked for months. They treat me
well there, and understood my situation. They said they’d understand and switch
my week if necessary. Not every club will do that, and I can understand why. It
often turns into a big hassle.
I made myself available for the corporate
date, and wouldn’t you know it they changed the date AGAIN. The lady I’m
dealing with dropped the ‘C’ word, and I knew I was in trouble. It’s a sure
fire recipe for disaster, and the word is ‘committee’. Any time a committee is involved, it’s hell.
They’re 99.999% of the time filled with
idiots that can’t make a decision, and I’ve been burned time and time again.
There is always ONE self appointed crusading comedy snob in the mix that thinks
he or she knows what funny is and it usually ends up being some inbred kin of
theirs that plays a kazoo and works for free beer. I’ve lost out countless
times to someone I never heard of.
Well, chalk up another one. I was booked for
their third night, but I told them I could get out of it if they could
guarantee the night at the same price. This was six times what I was to take in
for a one nighter that I’d have to drive several hours to get to. Had they said
yes, I’d have had to call yet a third booker and cancel a date I just booked.
They wouldn’t be happy, but money is money.
I heard from the lady a few minutes later
that they’d just booked someone else but she thanked me for my time and
patience. I wanted to dash off a nasty note, but I’ve learned from experience
that does far more harm than good. She didn’t mean to push all my buttons, but
she certainly did.
In the end, I’m still booked for the one
nighter I never cancelled, and the booker never knew I was even considering it.
I’ll drive farther than I want to, but it’s a decent gig and I’ll hope to sell
some merchandise and make it worth my while. I’m also rebooked in the comedy
club as well. It could have been a lot worse as often is the case, but this
time no real damage was done. Whew.
Drama scenes like this happen all the time. I’m
beyond sick of them by now but what can I do? It’s an unavoidable part of the
game, and if I don’t play at least a little I’m out of business by the end of the
day. The average Joe assumes comedians are on a ‘circuit’ and there’s some kind
of a
logical
and preset order. Sorry, it just doesn’t work that way. We have to fight for every
booking we get, and every week we deal with a new potential crisis. And people wonder
why I flip out.
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