Don't Poke The Tiger

Friday October 2nd, 2009 - Milwaukee, WI

Well, it’s a good thing I shut my phone off yesterday because apparently now I’m being stalked by the wife of the owner of Giggles. I didn’t even waste my time listening to any of the messages or look at any of the texts because I am not going to allow myself to sink any deeper into the red zone than I already am. I just want my money and I will move on.

There are apparently postings on Face book but I’m not even going to look at them so it won’t set me off. I deleted her emails too except the last one that said I was a coward. I’m actually doing them all a favor by not answering them because I will do something I’ll be sorry for later. I’ve been in this situation before and people just don’t know when to stop.

They keep poking and poking and poking and then I’m the bad guy when I snap. Sorry, I’m not going to stand for not getting paid. I’m going to get my money this time but it’s a total challenge for me not to grab a golf club and play a tune on someone’s head. I’m not a violent guy but there is a point where anyone would snap and I’m rapidly nearing mine.

This whole situation is so unnecessary. I’ve done great shows for them for piss poor pay for many years and one time I even donated an entire week’s pay to a charity because they have some kind of water head circus freak baby or something and I was trying to be nice.

This is the thanks I get? I guess you just can’t be nice to some people. It’s disrespectful and I won’t accept it. Call me a coward. Whatever. Better that than inmate. Those idiots aren’t worth my time at this point so I’m going to ignore everything - except my money.

This bridge is burned but I couldn’t care less because it’s a second rate club and sinking fast. I do expect to be PAID for a brutal week of work where I had to spend it apologizing for the filthy opener to people who came to see me. The whole experience was disgusting.

I tried to be professional about it and go through the booker but that doesn’t seem to be working. Apparently he forwarded it to the owner who showed it to his wife who thought she was really getting to me by calling me a coward. Ooooh, I’m SO crushed. Woe is me.

I’ve got skin as thick as a watermelon rind when it comes to stuff like that and if she is stupid enough to think my ignoring her is a ‘victory’, then so be it. She has no idea of my smoldering inner rage or how hard I’ve tried my whole life to keep it under control. I have to fight it especially hard at times like this or I’ll turn into the Incredible Hulk. Not good.

I don’t want to threaten anyone or fight with anyone or do anything but get paid for my completed work. I can get mean with the best of them and the last thing those people need in their lives is my undivided attention. I don’t want to go there because it won’t end well.

Why does life have to unfold like this? Am I supposed to learn a lesson from it? I have always treated people well, or at least I thought I have. Maybe it’s me. This situation isn’t pleasant on any level and I wish I never would have worked for them. But I did. Too late.

I thought it was just a Milwaukee thing because I had a similar experience across town at another debauchery pit years ago but that’s just been in two comedy clubs. Actually my experience at Jokerz was very pleasant, but I stupidly went with Giggles because I tried to be ‘loyal’. What a dummy I was. Jokerz paid me more money and offered me more work.

The owner of Giggles asked me to make a decision and we had gotten along pretty well for several years so I thought I was being a ‘good soldier’ by being loyal. And now I get a rubber check as a reward. Who wouldn’t be furious about it? I know I’m not the only one.

This is small time minutia from small time thinkers. Comedy clubs are DEAD, and I am wasting my time trying to carve out a future in them. There are still some good ones and I still love to perform but the numbers game of getting into these clubs are shrinking daily.

I’ll stand by my record as a whole, and it’s overwhelmingly positive. I am usually a very easygoing guy and keep to myself. I’m not a partier and I don’t drink at all so I don’t hang with the staff as a whole but that’s not a bad thing. I find I stay out of trouble that way but sometimes a staff can take that as being aloof. It does have a bearing on getting rehired.

Unfortunately, none of that has anything to do with FUNNY. That’s what I’m interested in and nothing else. That’s the reason many of us put up with insanity like this in the first place. We want the work. I’m getting past that now. Yes, I still want to work but not if the situation is like this particular one. It’s ugly, uncalled for and it’s a watermark in my life.

This was the straw that broke the camel’s back for me. If I have to work at Wendy’s for a while or park cars or whatever I need to do to survive I’ll do it but I’m going to move on from this level and not work for these kind of people anymore. I have busted my ass for a lifetime and getting a bounced check AND called a coward is not on my ‘to do‘ list now.

On the other hand, I was in Milwaukee today and sat in on The D List on ESPN. Totally different vibe in there, let me tell you. Drew and Dan are always fantastic and they always make me feel like a big star. Their producer Matt ‘Fish’ Salmon and everyone in there has always rolled out the red carpet and that’s the vibe I’ll keep supporting. Those guys rock.

They were kind enough to invite me up to hang out for the pregame buildup for the big Packers/Vikings Monday Night Football game this week. There was food and fun and the other guest was Caitlin Morrall, a beauty pageant winner who loves sports. We’ve shared studio time before and she’s the real deal. She’s very well spoken and stunning to look at.

She’s also very funny and nice too. She won the lottery but she isn’t cocky at all and we all had a blast making picks and talking sports and it made me realize that life is about the vibe and this is a good one. Giggles brings out my rage. The D List makes me feel at ease.

Being an entertainer is difficult enough without having to deal with thorns like this. I’ve had my fill and need to focus on making myself financially able to blow these people out of my life. Too bad I picked the worst financial time to do it. That’s why I’m Mr. Lucky.