Monday, July 15, 2013

The Worst Movie Ever

Sunday July 14th, 2013 – Kenosha, WI

   It’s over. I thought so before, but now I’m convinced beyond the shadow of a doubt. The sense of humor of the American mass public has degenerated so low that I have officially lost hope for future generations. In the war between creativity and stupidity, stupidity has emerged victorious.  
   What comedians find funny has long been a mismatch with the public’s taste, but now it’s out of control. If I ever thought I had a chance at being a big star with the masses, those thoughts are now officially dead after seeing the movie “This Is The End” today. I’m still not out of shock as to how horrific it was on every level, and if I could sue someone to get my time back I would. 

   Is this what people find funny today? I could barely sit through one predictable and uncreative “joke” after the next, and after about ten minutes I thought the title should have been changed to “WILL It End?” There was absolutely nothing redeeming whatsoever about this two hour turd.

   I’m not a major movie goer like many of my comic and non comic friends, but I’d have to say this was THE worst movie I have ever seen in my entire life, bar none. Period. That says quite a bit, as I’ve seen some bad ones – mostly comedies. Comedy is HARD, so when will Hollywood or anywhere else admit it and show respect? Nothing proves it more than watching poor work.

   This was as bad as it gets, and I had a hard time sitting through it. The only reason I stayed was that my friend Gary Pansch had free passes, and invited me to go with him. Gary is a very funny comedian and funny person in general – or so I’d thought. He ended up really liking the movie. 

   I thought he was kidding at first, but he pointed out scenes and lines he liked and that made me feel like I was getting punked by the universe. I failed to see one funny thing about this chunk of cinematic ca-ca, and it really left a sour taste in my mouth. If this is now “comedy”, I’m finished.

   It was actually a lot like the open mic I attended last Friday. It was rambling, filthy and I could see no recognizable talent anywhere. Again, I am no prude but being dirty just for the shock of it doesn’t work more than once. IF that’s the way a performer chooses to work, there needs to be a structure that builds up to the shock. Coming out of the box with it shows a total incompetence.

   There must have been at least a thousand ‘F-bombs’ dropped in this movie – none of them with any purpose. That word can have impact if used correctly, and I’m not against it in the right kind of scenario. I’ve used it myself to great success on occasion, but the word itself is a loaded pistol.

   Pointing it aimlessly and recklessly will only lead to trouble, and also take away any impact the word could and should have. No words are offensive to me personally, but disrespecting the craft of comedy like that is something I won’t tolerate. Using strong language should be a well earned privilege. I know that sounds odd, but it’s true. One needs to know how to use any comedic tool.

   What shocked me was that I’d read positive reviews about this movie, and was hoping to have a few laughs and relax for a while. The premise of the end of the world could be intriguing, on a comedic level, but they did absolutely nothing with it – even with their budget of $90 million.

   Comedy movies don’t need special effects or a big budget. They need JOKES, and Hollywood doesn’t seem to get that. This was embarrassing, and if that’s what comedy has become I am not interested in any part of it. But they’re all rich and I’m struggling to pay my rent, so who’s right?

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