Tuesday January 8th, 2008 - Palatine, IL/Lake Villa, IL
I knew I would be in for a lot of work this year and I was right. Time management is my biggest concern and I am starting to see just how important it is if I will accomplish any of my goals. I made some ambitious ones and it’s already January 8th and I haven’t really got anything done yet. I’ve been trying to get things done but life has been getting in the way.
Driving to Pittsburgh and back took time. Yes I listened to helpful instruction tapes as I drove and they were great but it’s draining to drive 600 miles each way to go to work. I’m going in a lot of directions and this is not going to be easy. Yesterday was not only fun but productive too. Getting on the radio is always good and hosting the Zanies show felt great but I had to get there and back both times and it was an all day affair just to get that done.
Today I had lunch with Marc Schultz like I do quite often. Marc is a friend and a booker and I told him I was working not only on my new business but also on preparing a quality package he can use to sell to corporate clients. That will cost a couple thousand dollars at least and will take time to prepare a video that will sell to that audience. I need to be in the right environment and dressed in a suit if I’m going to get the gigs that pay the big money.
That all takes time and effort too. My plate is already full but I know I can do those gigs if I get the bookings. But I need to prepare a package to sell myself. And what about all of the clubs? I still haven’t made an effort to reconnect with all my contacts there like I really need to do. I was going to do that today but Marc called and wanted to have lunch. I love hanging out and it’s usually productive too but it shoots a good portion of the day to hell.
On the way to Marc’s house I got a call from Jim McHugh. He and Mike Preston have a similar situation to me in that they’re both trying to spread out from the comedy clubs and start their own things just like I’m doing with Uranus Factory Outlet. We all thought it’s a good idea to create a weekly round table type lunch to encourage each other’s projects for the new year. We were going to meet tomorrow but Mike was busy so we made it today.
We met at a place that’s not far from Marc’s house and about 45 minutes for each of us. I went from lunch with Marc to lunch with the guys so one thing I’m doing very well at in 2008 is lunch. We bounced ideas around and it was fun but that still didn’t accomplish any tangible results for any of us. Mike went over a new character he is doing and it was funny and well done and hopefully Jim and I were able to make some suggestions he can use but all three of us are starting the new year with no financial security and that’s not pleasant.
If time really is money mine is slipping through my fingers. I’m working hard and trying to accomplish things but I think I may have stacked my plate even higher than I imagined. I didn’t make time to exercise today and I was still sore from all the walking I did to get to the train station and back yesterday. And I didn’t get to spend one minute writing comedy.
The desk I bought a few weeks ago now has piles of papers on it all disjointed and I feel I am sliding into quicksand only a week into the new year. It’s still early enough to catch it and reverse the trend but I definitely can see my time will be tight if I want to do all this.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Train Training
Monday January 7th, 2008 - Chicago, IL
New year, new experiences. I was born in Milwaukee but the Chicago area has been my home for over twenty years. I remember being about six and riding through Chicago with my grandparents and knowing then that I wanted to live here. I loved the vibe and the tall buildings and something in me just clicked even at that early age. I have no idea why but I just knew it. My grandmother thought I was possessed by an evil spirit when I told her.
She hated Chicago. HATED it. Many Wisconsin people do. Not me. I loved it then and I still do today. The only things that irk me about Chicago are toll roads and the Bears. If those are the only two things that irritate me then I’m ok. I can avoid all the toll roads and I’m still a Packer fan. Other than that I have always felt at home being based out of here.
That’s why I am surprised it took until today to ride on a METRA train. As long as I’ve lived here the wonderful train system and I have never bonded. When I was a kid I learned the Milwaukee bus system backward and forward and knew how to get around town and I bet I still could. I even knew most of the numbers of the bus routes. But then I got a car.
A car was symbolic of freedom for me and I fell deeply in love with the concept. I might have traded cars through the years and I’m well over 100 in the number of vehicles I have owned at one time or another but I still made it a point to have a car and not take a train. I moved to Chicago with a car and never bothered to learn the system here. I didn’t need to.
Now I feel that I need to. Living in Lake Villa is a huge pain. I don’t like it and I’ll move eventually but for now it’s convenient so I need to adapt and deal with it for a while. It’s a long way from downtown Chicago but there is a train station three blocks from where I’m living and that’s one of the things that sealed the deal of me moving here. Today I used it.
I need to be at WLS on Monday mornings at 10:30 to do Jerry Agar’s radio show. It’s a lot of fun to be on the show with other comedians doing a weekly news round up but it’s a huge hassle getting to the station. Parking is a nightmare and it costs $28 to park in the lot around the block and I’m not thrilled with that. Would I pay $28 to get on WLS to get my name mentioned for 20 minutes every week? Well, yes. But I don‘t have to so why do it?
A train ticket is $6 one way. I can walk to the station from my house and that’s good for some exercise and I also don’t have to fight traffic and use my gas so that’s good too. I’ve been meaning to take the train into the city since I moved out here and today was the day.
I looked up the schedule and the latest one I could take left at 6:55 and dropped me off at Union Station downtown at 8:30. I don’t need to be at the station until 10:15 but that’s ok. I don’t mind being early. It gives me time to grab some breakfast and a newspaper.
The train came and I got on and had no idea what to do. I felt like a total ass asking the conductor what the procedure was but he was very nice and asked me where I was going. I told him and he sold me a ticket for $6 and that was it. I sat back to soak up the sights.
I remember having this same feeling the first time I took a Greyhound bus. I was maybe 19 and wanted to leave Milwaukee any way I could. I quit my nowhere job as a cook right in the middle of my shift and went to the Greyhound station and bought a ticket to Dallas. I don’t know why I picked Dallas but at the time it seemed warm and wasn’t Milwaukee.
I had no idea what to do then either but I bought my ticket and got on the bus and had a feeling of apprehension mixed with adventure that was actually kind of cool. I knew I was going to survive but wasn’t exactly sure how but I looked around at everyone on that bus and thought if they could do it I certainly could. Greyhound is great for the self esteem.
I had the same feeling today. I knew I wasn’t going to die and I had cash to pay for the ticket so how bad could it be? I’d look like an ass for a few seconds and not know what to do and then I’d ask and someone would tell me and that would be it. No big deal. Would I be able to handle that? Sure. But still there is a degree of uneasiness in a new experience.
Watching the people get on the train was a learning experience. Most of them looked so sad and out of it I wanted to do my act to try and cheer them up. This was the train to the rat race and by the looks on the faces I saw the rats were winning the race. I watched as it filled up and felt a whole lot better about the life decisions I made in the last twenty years.
At least I’ve had some adventure in my life. I cheered right up after seeing everyone else trudge through their daily grind and when we got to Union Station I felt like a big winner. I walked to the station and that was fun too. I love downtown Chicago and it was a brisk walk on an unseasonably warm day in January and I felt like I accomplished a new task.
The radio show went well and hopefully this will be a weekly tradition. We got to meet the General Manager of the station and he was very complimentary of the bit and I think it will at least be given a chance. That’s all I ask and in the past I’ve never gotten it in radio. There’s no pressure on me at all here. I’m just doing this for fun and to hang with friends.
My return train leaves at 1pm and gets me back at 2:30 so that’s a full day. I got back to Lake Villa and walked home to check emails and shower and then I needed to be at Zanies in Chicago to host a new talent showcase at 8:30. If I could take a train there too I would but they don’t run late at night so I have to drive. I left early so I would get there on time.
The show tonight was one of if not the best showcase we’ve ever had. The audience was wonderful and the place was packed. It’s hard to predict Mondays but this one was a gem. The comedians were all very good too. It was just one of those nights that clicked and all I had to do was drive the bus. If there’s one thing I know how to do it’s host a live show.
I’ve got a lot more shows to host this year and I’m thrilled to be able to do it. I really do enjoy it especially when it’s like this. I can get the crowd up and I give the comedians their own special introduction and put a little showbiz into it and it’s fun. This makes getting up at 5:30 to catch a train downtown and back and then driving into the city all worth it. This will probably be my Monday schedule for the next little while so I better learn to enjoy it.
New year, new experiences. I was born in Milwaukee but the Chicago area has been my home for over twenty years. I remember being about six and riding through Chicago with my grandparents and knowing then that I wanted to live here. I loved the vibe and the tall buildings and something in me just clicked even at that early age. I have no idea why but I just knew it. My grandmother thought I was possessed by an evil spirit when I told her.
She hated Chicago. HATED it. Many Wisconsin people do. Not me. I loved it then and I still do today. The only things that irk me about Chicago are toll roads and the Bears. If those are the only two things that irritate me then I’m ok. I can avoid all the toll roads and I’m still a Packer fan. Other than that I have always felt at home being based out of here.
That’s why I am surprised it took until today to ride on a METRA train. As long as I’ve lived here the wonderful train system and I have never bonded. When I was a kid I learned the Milwaukee bus system backward and forward and knew how to get around town and I bet I still could. I even knew most of the numbers of the bus routes. But then I got a car.
A car was symbolic of freedom for me and I fell deeply in love with the concept. I might have traded cars through the years and I’m well over 100 in the number of vehicles I have owned at one time or another but I still made it a point to have a car and not take a train. I moved to Chicago with a car and never bothered to learn the system here. I didn’t need to.
Now I feel that I need to. Living in Lake Villa is a huge pain. I don’t like it and I’ll move eventually but for now it’s convenient so I need to adapt and deal with it for a while. It’s a long way from downtown Chicago but there is a train station three blocks from where I’m living and that’s one of the things that sealed the deal of me moving here. Today I used it.
I need to be at WLS on Monday mornings at 10:30 to do Jerry Agar’s radio show. It’s a lot of fun to be on the show with other comedians doing a weekly news round up but it’s a huge hassle getting to the station. Parking is a nightmare and it costs $28 to park in the lot around the block and I’m not thrilled with that. Would I pay $28 to get on WLS to get my name mentioned for 20 minutes every week? Well, yes. But I don‘t have to so why do it?
A train ticket is $6 one way. I can walk to the station from my house and that’s good for some exercise and I also don’t have to fight traffic and use my gas so that’s good too. I’ve been meaning to take the train into the city since I moved out here and today was the day.
I looked up the schedule and the latest one I could take left at 6:55 and dropped me off at Union Station downtown at 8:30. I don’t need to be at the station until 10:15 but that’s ok. I don’t mind being early. It gives me time to grab some breakfast and a newspaper.
The train came and I got on and had no idea what to do. I felt like a total ass asking the conductor what the procedure was but he was very nice and asked me where I was going. I told him and he sold me a ticket for $6 and that was it. I sat back to soak up the sights.
I remember having this same feeling the first time I took a Greyhound bus. I was maybe 19 and wanted to leave Milwaukee any way I could. I quit my nowhere job as a cook right in the middle of my shift and went to the Greyhound station and bought a ticket to Dallas. I don’t know why I picked Dallas but at the time it seemed warm and wasn’t Milwaukee.
I had no idea what to do then either but I bought my ticket and got on the bus and had a feeling of apprehension mixed with adventure that was actually kind of cool. I knew I was going to survive but wasn’t exactly sure how but I looked around at everyone on that bus and thought if they could do it I certainly could. Greyhound is great for the self esteem.
I had the same feeling today. I knew I wasn’t going to die and I had cash to pay for the ticket so how bad could it be? I’d look like an ass for a few seconds and not know what to do and then I’d ask and someone would tell me and that would be it. No big deal. Would I be able to handle that? Sure. But still there is a degree of uneasiness in a new experience.
Watching the people get on the train was a learning experience. Most of them looked so sad and out of it I wanted to do my act to try and cheer them up. This was the train to the rat race and by the looks on the faces I saw the rats were winning the race. I watched as it filled up and felt a whole lot better about the life decisions I made in the last twenty years.
At least I’ve had some adventure in my life. I cheered right up after seeing everyone else trudge through their daily grind and when we got to Union Station I felt like a big winner. I walked to the station and that was fun too. I love downtown Chicago and it was a brisk walk on an unseasonably warm day in January and I felt like I accomplished a new task.
The radio show went well and hopefully this will be a weekly tradition. We got to meet the General Manager of the station and he was very complimentary of the bit and I think it will at least be given a chance. That’s all I ask and in the past I’ve never gotten it in radio. There’s no pressure on me at all here. I’m just doing this for fun and to hang with friends.
My return train leaves at 1pm and gets me back at 2:30 so that’s a full day. I got back to Lake Villa and walked home to check emails and shower and then I needed to be at Zanies in Chicago to host a new talent showcase at 8:30. If I could take a train there too I would but they don’t run late at night so I have to drive. I left early so I would get there on time.
The show tonight was one of if not the best showcase we’ve ever had. The audience was wonderful and the place was packed. It’s hard to predict Mondays but this one was a gem. The comedians were all very good too. It was just one of those nights that clicked and all I had to do was drive the bus. If there’s one thing I know how to do it’s host a live show.
I’ve got a lot more shows to host this year and I’m thrilled to be able to do it. I really do enjoy it especially when it’s like this. I can get the crowd up and I give the comedians their own special introduction and put a little showbiz into it and it’s fun. This makes getting up at 5:30 to catch a train downtown and back and then driving into the city all worth it. This will probably be my Monday schedule for the next little while so I better learn to enjoy it.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Long Drive Home
Sunday January 6th, 2008 - Pittsburgh, PA/Lake Villa, IL
612 miles is a long way to drive home from work. I got up at 6am Central Time and was packed and on the road by 6:15. I was thinking about driving last night but decided against it very quickly because of the large amount of drunks coming out of the Steelers game that ended late. I got stuck in the traffic on the way back to the hotel and it was a giant mess.
It must have taken 45 minutes to go five miles from the club to the hotel. There were all kinds of delays because nobody knew how to merge and I thought there were going to be quite a number of people going at it with fists. It was ugly and scary but especially for me. I am not from here and don’t know the ins and outs and backroads like most of these guys do. There were all kinds of abrupt lane changes and horns blasting and I was very nervous.
I wasn’t drunk but most of those people were. If I were to get crunched by a carload of juiced up steelworkers there’s no way they’d stop and give me their phone number like the driver’s manual says. I was thrilled to get out of that traffic jam with my bumpers intact so when I got to the hotel I didn’t push my luck. I crawled into bed to get some needed rest.
These long drives are getting very old. I’ve made so many of them that the thrill is gone and I never thought I’d say that. I used to love taking cross country drives because I could get a chance to see new places I’ve never been before. I’ve been everywhere now and I’m really not in any hurry to go back to Wheeling, WV. I was there today and it’s no big deal.
The weather was great all the way back and that was a big plus. It was really warm and I had the window down much of the way trying to blow the cobwebs out of my brain pipe. I used the car as a mobile office and tried to get some work done to be productive. I had my tape series on starting a business by Brian Tracy and was able to finish all six cassettes. I’ll listen to it again too because there are a lot of helpful tips on it. I’m glad I brought it along and if I’m going to be in the car anyway I might as well do something that helps me learn.
I also took a few hours to plan out my products I want to create. I came up with a lot of ideas and wrote them down but now I have to make them happen. NOT easy and I know I won’t be able to get to all of them but I wrote them all down anyway. If I can pull off half of what I wrote down I’m going to be busy for quite a few months. That’s ok. I live for it.
It’s time to reconnect with my bookers list too. Even if I am planning to go into the mail order business I still need to earn a living and need to stay in touch and get some bookings to pay my bills. I made a list of those I haven’t contacted in a while and it’s about 40-50. I should really update my bio and get new pictures taken and send them out to each of them but I’m not ready to do that yet. If I change pictures now I need to be the King of Uranus.
That’s not a finished product yet so I can’t do that. I can send an email or call them for a booking in ‘08 or just to send my avails. My booking schedule looks good through March so it’s not an emergency but it’s smart to not let it get to that point. I’ve got a lot of things to do and it’s only the 6th of January. So much for my day off. Back to work tomorrow.
612 miles is a long way to drive home from work. I got up at 6am Central Time and was packed and on the road by 6:15. I was thinking about driving last night but decided against it very quickly because of the large amount of drunks coming out of the Steelers game that ended late. I got stuck in the traffic on the way back to the hotel and it was a giant mess.
It must have taken 45 minutes to go five miles from the club to the hotel. There were all kinds of delays because nobody knew how to merge and I thought there were going to be quite a number of people going at it with fists. It was ugly and scary but especially for me. I am not from here and don’t know the ins and outs and backroads like most of these guys do. There were all kinds of abrupt lane changes and horns blasting and I was very nervous.
I wasn’t drunk but most of those people were. If I were to get crunched by a carload of juiced up steelworkers there’s no way they’d stop and give me their phone number like the driver’s manual says. I was thrilled to get out of that traffic jam with my bumpers intact so when I got to the hotel I didn’t push my luck. I crawled into bed to get some needed rest.
These long drives are getting very old. I’ve made so many of them that the thrill is gone and I never thought I’d say that. I used to love taking cross country drives because I could get a chance to see new places I’ve never been before. I’ve been everywhere now and I’m really not in any hurry to go back to Wheeling, WV. I was there today and it’s no big deal.
The weather was great all the way back and that was a big plus. It was really warm and I had the window down much of the way trying to blow the cobwebs out of my brain pipe. I used the car as a mobile office and tried to get some work done to be productive. I had my tape series on starting a business by Brian Tracy and was able to finish all six cassettes. I’ll listen to it again too because there are a lot of helpful tips on it. I’m glad I brought it along and if I’m going to be in the car anyway I might as well do something that helps me learn.
I also took a few hours to plan out my products I want to create. I came up with a lot of ideas and wrote them down but now I have to make them happen. NOT easy and I know I won’t be able to get to all of them but I wrote them all down anyway. If I can pull off half of what I wrote down I’m going to be busy for quite a few months. That’s ok. I live for it.
It’s time to reconnect with my bookers list too. Even if I am planning to go into the mail order business I still need to earn a living and need to stay in touch and get some bookings to pay my bills. I made a list of those I haven’t contacted in a while and it’s about 40-50. I should really update my bio and get new pictures taken and send them out to each of them but I’m not ready to do that yet. If I change pictures now I need to be the King of Uranus.
That’s not a finished product yet so I can’t do that. I can send an email or call them for a booking in ‘08 or just to send my avails. My booking schedule looks good through March so it’s not an emergency but it’s smart to not let it get to that point. I’ve got a lot of things to do and it’s only the 6th of January. So much for my day off. Back to work tomorrow.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Steeler Reeler
Saturday January 5th, 2008 - Pittsburgh, PA
It’s always something. Always. Last night it was Hannah Montana. Tonight the Steelers home playoff game wiped out the early show. How often does an NFL game wipe out the comedy show on a SATURDAY night? Almost never. Almost. This was a true fluke but it still cost us the show. Nobody showed up. Not one person. It looked like a ghost town for a couple of hours as we just sat around and waited hoping there would be a second show.
I did get a chance to hang out with a couple of the waitresses who were gorgeous. This town is full of spectacularly beautiful women and always has been. They have a very tough side to them too which is odd but not unappealing at all. This is a tough town and even the women reflect that attitude. It’s working class all the way and they’re not ashamed of it.
It’s funny to see a stunningly hot woman cuss out some guy trying to pick them up and I usually get to see it several times when I’m here. They don’t take any lip and can dish it as well as anyone. Just sitting around and listening to the waitresses talk was very amusing as we waited for the time to pass. I wouldn’t mess with these chicks but they were still great to look at. They thought I was funny too which never hurts. If they didn’t I’d get beaten.
We did end up having a second show and it was about as difficult as a show can be. The game was still going on and by the time I got on it was late in the second half. Everyone in the club had Steeler jerseys on and much like a Packer crowd life revolves around football in these parts. There was a delicate balance all through the show of keeping them updated.
There were about 50 people and they were very nice but when there was a touchdown it took their attention away. They would hear the screaming of the people at the bar so I had to get someone to give us an update and it was very difficult to do bits and keep score for a whole 45 minute show. They laughed and were nice but it still was hard to coordinate it.
Pulling off a show tonight took every one of my years of experience. They had NO idea how difficult it was and didn’t care. They were there for a show but still were interested in the game too. That’s understandable but it didn’t make it any easier. I had to work them at a number of levels and it kept me on my toes the whole time. I earned my money this time.
What made it even worse is that the Steelers went ahead in the last few minutes and they went nuts. I had to dance around that and still keep them laughing which I was able to do. Then at the last minute they lost and some people came in from the bar and the room went dead. It was like a morgue and I had only a few more minutes to go. Talk about a switch.
I have a strong closing bit and I launched into that and took no prisoners. I put as much energy as I could into it and worked big and animated and gave it all I had. I got a little bit of momentum going and they came on board so I rode it all the way home and got off to a nice applause pop but walking through the audience I was thrilled that this one was over. I enjoy working in Pittsburgh and the blue collar crowd usually likes me back. This was not a normal situation but what in my life ever is? I’ll take my check and drive home quickly.
It’s always something. Always. Last night it was Hannah Montana. Tonight the Steelers home playoff game wiped out the early show. How often does an NFL game wipe out the comedy show on a SATURDAY night? Almost never. Almost. This was a true fluke but it still cost us the show. Nobody showed up. Not one person. It looked like a ghost town for a couple of hours as we just sat around and waited hoping there would be a second show.
I did get a chance to hang out with a couple of the waitresses who were gorgeous. This town is full of spectacularly beautiful women and always has been. They have a very tough side to them too which is odd but not unappealing at all. This is a tough town and even the women reflect that attitude. It’s working class all the way and they’re not ashamed of it.
It’s funny to see a stunningly hot woman cuss out some guy trying to pick them up and I usually get to see it several times when I’m here. They don’t take any lip and can dish it as well as anyone. Just sitting around and listening to the waitresses talk was very amusing as we waited for the time to pass. I wouldn’t mess with these chicks but they were still great to look at. They thought I was funny too which never hurts. If they didn’t I’d get beaten.
We did end up having a second show and it was about as difficult as a show can be. The game was still going on and by the time I got on it was late in the second half. Everyone in the club had Steeler jerseys on and much like a Packer crowd life revolves around football in these parts. There was a delicate balance all through the show of keeping them updated.
There were about 50 people and they were very nice but when there was a touchdown it took their attention away. They would hear the screaming of the people at the bar so I had to get someone to give us an update and it was very difficult to do bits and keep score for a whole 45 minute show. They laughed and were nice but it still was hard to coordinate it.
Pulling off a show tonight took every one of my years of experience. They had NO idea how difficult it was and didn’t care. They were there for a show but still were interested in the game too. That’s understandable but it didn’t make it any easier. I had to work them at a number of levels and it kept me on my toes the whole time. I earned my money this time.
What made it even worse is that the Steelers went ahead in the last few minutes and they went nuts. I had to dance around that and still keep them laughing which I was able to do. Then at the last minute they lost and some people came in from the bar and the room went dead. It was like a morgue and I had only a few more minutes to go. Talk about a switch.
I have a strong closing bit and I launched into that and took no prisoners. I put as much energy as I could into it and worked big and animated and gave it all I had. I got a little bit of momentum going and they came on board so I rode it all the way home and got off to a nice applause pop but walking through the audience I was thrilled that this one was over. I enjoy working in Pittsburgh and the blue collar crowd usually likes me back. This was not a normal situation but what in my life ever is? I’ll take my check and drive home quickly.
Friday, January 4, 2008
Hannah Mania
Friday January 4th, 2008 - Pittsburgh, PA
Hannah Montana fascinates me. I couldn’t care less about the actual show itself but the mania it’s creating has my full attention. The live show is here in Pittsburgh and it was all over the local news how tickets were going for $2000 each. The Steelers are playing in an important playoff game tomorrow and it’s easier to get a Steelers ticket than one of these.
What did the Hannah Montana show plug into to create such a fever? The news stations are comparing it with Beatlemania and that’s pretty amazing company. This whole thing is a money printer and Billy Ray Cyrus of all people is sitting in the driver’s seat. I guess he’s not as big of a goober as everyone thought but I still don’t understand why this is so hot.
Sports plugs into the ‘us against them’ thing deep down in all of us. I get that. But what does a teenage girl who sings plug into besides teenage boys? Most of the kids who go see the show seem to be girls so it must be some kind of a fantasy thing but it sure is working. The last thing that plugged into teenage girls like this was Madonna back in the early ‘80s.
Young girls dressed like Madonna and wanted to be like her back then. I couldn’t figure that one out either but Madonna sure cashed in on it. But not like this. This one is amazing beyond belief. It was the lead story on every news channel tonight but it’s nation wide too. I’ve been trying to create some kind of mania for over 20 years and this kid shows me up.
She’s showing the world up. I hope she saves her money and has a nice life when it’s all over but for now that doesn’t look to be any time soon. I’m not sure if this affected any of our audience at the club tonight but I wouldn’t be surprised if it did. We had PLENTY of seats available for both shows this evening. Any scalper selling my tickets didn’t make out.
We still had fun shows though. I have a couple who saw me last time that think I am the funniest comedian they’ve ever seen. They said they’ve been watching until I came back to town so they could see me again. That’s very flattering to get that and after the first show they came up and told me I was funnier than ever. That’s the reason I keep doing comedy.
But that’s two people in Pittsburgh. Hannah Montana has THOUSANDS of people who are fighting to get tickets to see her show. Can’t I have a few HUNDRED fighting for me? It’s feast or famine and I don’t know what else to do except keep doing what I’m doing as long as I can while I work on Uranus Factory Outlet. That is my main hope for security.
Every performer dreams of having a big run at some point. It’s never forever but it does add credibility forever. All the rock bands of the ‘70s and now ‘80s tour car shows for the rest of their lives because they had a few hits on the radio. Even a few comedians get their chance to tour forever because they had some time in the spotlight. That big run is crucial.
Tommy Chong still tours and so does Jimmie Walker. They still get booked because of a career they had 30 years ago. I don’t have that. Nobody cares that I was on a few morning radio shows in the ‘90s. That’s why I’m creating ‘The King Of Uranus‘. I need a gimmick.
Hannah Montana fascinates me. I couldn’t care less about the actual show itself but the mania it’s creating has my full attention. The live show is here in Pittsburgh and it was all over the local news how tickets were going for $2000 each. The Steelers are playing in an important playoff game tomorrow and it’s easier to get a Steelers ticket than one of these.
What did the Hannah Montana show plug into to create such a fever? The news stations are comparing it with Beatlemania and that’s pretty amazing company. This whole thing is a money printer and Billy Ray Cyrus of all people is sitting in the driver’s seat. I guess he’s not as big of a goober as everyone thought but I still don’t understand why this is so hot.
Sports plugs into the ‘us against them’ thing deep down in all of us. I get that. But what does a teenage girl who sings plug into besides teenage boys? Most of the kids who go see the show seem to be girls so it must be some kind of a fantasy thing but it sure is working. The last thing that plugged into teenage girls like this was Madonna back in the early ‘80s.
Young girls dressed like Madonna and wanted to be like her back then. I couldn’t figure that one out either but Madonna sure cashed in on it. But not like this. This one is amazing beyond belief. It was the lead story on every news channel tonight but it’s nation wide too. I’ve been trying to create some kind of mania for over 20 years and this kid shows me up.
She’s showing the world up. I hope she saves her money and has a nice life when it’s all over but for now that doesn’t look to be any time soon. I’m not sure if this affected any of our audience at the club tonight but I wouldn’t be surprised if it did. We had PLENTY of seats available for both shows this evening. Any scalper selling my tickets didn’t make out.
We still had fun shows though. I have a couple who saw me last time that think I am the funniest comedian they’ve ever seen. They said they’ve been watching until I came back to town so they could see me again. That’s very flattering to get that and after the first show they came up and told me I was funnier than ever. That’s the reason I keep doing comedy.
But that’s two people in Pittsburgh. Hannah Montana has THOUSANDS of people who are fighting to get tickets to see her show. Can’t I have a few HUNDRED fighting for me? It’s feast or famine and I don’t know what else to do except keep doing what I’m doing as long as I can while I work on Uranus Factory Outlet. That is my main hope for security.
Every performer dreams of having a big run at some point. It’s never forever but it does add credibility forever. All the rock bands of the ‘70s and now ‘80s tour car shows for the rest of their lives because they had a few hits on the radio. Even a few comedians get their chance to tour forever because they had some time in the spotlight. That big run is crucial.
Tommy Chong still tours and so does Jimmie Walker. They still get booked because of a career they had 30 years ago. I don’t have that. Nobody cares that I was on a few morning radio shows in the ‘90s. That’s why I’m creating ‘The King Of Uranus‘. I need a gimmick.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Pittsburgh Pride
Thursday January 3rd, 2008 - Pittsburgh, PA
You never forget your first and for me this was it. Pittsburgh will always have a special place in my heart because this is where I came for my first real comedy road gig. I played the Funny Bone then just like I am this week but the club was in a different location. I can still remember what a thrill it was to get booked for a whole week at a real comedy club.
The owners of this Bone are two brothers that opened one in Milwaukee in the mid ‘80s because they had a cousin there. I answered the phones, cleaned urinals, sat people for the show and was their emcee as often as I could get stage time. It was my education in show business even though at the time I didn’t realize it. Looking back now it was SO exciting.
I remember when one of the brothers asked if I wanted to go to Pittsburgh for a week. I just about jumped through the ceiling tiles with excitement. I would be driving with a local magician at the time named Kyle Nape. We’d split the gas and a room and I would be paid the grand sum of $150 for the week. PAID? I’d have walked here and paid them to do it.
The hotel we stayed in was thoroughly disgusting and I can still recall the stench of urine in the elevators like it was yesterday. It was called The Brentwood and I can’t believe I’m able to remember it all these years later but it was a dream come true to get a paid week. I was thrilled to get it but in retrospect I sure wasn’t ready. I was horrible the entire week.
I was booked as the opener and had to do 15 minutes. I thought I had that aced but not so. Some of my stuff was pretty local to Milwaukee back then and time shrinks quickly for an aspiring comic in a new town. I was in over my head and I knew it after the first show. I’m very that lucky Kyle Nape was a good guy. He helped me make it through the week.
Getting that $150 was about as proud a moment as I’ve ever had in my life. I wanted to call my father and tell him but I knew he couldn’t have cared less. I didn’t have his number anyway so it wouldn’t have mattered but I felt like I had really accomplished something to get paid for going to a far away city and telling jokes on stage. Looking back on it - I did.
I sure have come a long way since that week. I know I wasn’t worth the $150 I got paid then but there have been many times since when I’ve given shows that have been the exact opposite. Now I feel like I’M the one getting ripped off. Back then I wasn’t ready for that but now I am over ready. It brought back memories to walk in the Funny Bone club today.
This is going to be a brutal weekend because the Steelers play on Saturday night at 8pm. That’ll kill both shows and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. Tonight we had fifteen people but they were nice and I easily did a strong 45 minute headliner set and didn’t even think twice. I wish I could have had myself back then see myself now. I‘d have loved it all.
No matter what happens this week I’ll be ok. I’m here to work and that’s what I’ll do all weekend. During the day I’m the King Of Uranus and at night I’m a comedy headliner. At least I’m in a nice hotel this time. It’s a beautiful Radisson with no urine smells anywhere.
You never forget your first and for me this was it. Pittsburgh will always have a special place in my heart because this is where I came for my first real comedy road gig. I played the Funny Bone then just like I am this week but the club was in a different location. I can still remember what a thrill it was to get booked for a whole week at a real comedy club.
The owners of this Bone are two brothers that opened one in Milwaukee in the mid ‘80s because they had a cousin there. I answered the phones, cleaned urinals, sat people for the show and was their emcee as often as I could get stage time. It was my education in show business even though at the time I didn’t realize it. Looking back now it was SO exciting.
I remember when one of the brothers asked if I wanted to go to Pittsburgh for a week. I just about jumped through the ceiling tiles with excitement. I would be driving with a local magician at the time named Kyle Nape. We’d split the gas and a room and I would be paid the grand sum of $150 for the week. PAID? I’d have walked here and paid them to do it.
The hotel we stayed in was thoroughly disgusting and I can still recall the stench of urine in the elevators like it was yesterday. It was called The Brentwood and I can’t believe I’m able to remember it all these years later but it was a dream come true to get a paid week. I was thrilled to get it but in retrospect I sure wasn’t ready. I was horrible the entire week.
I was booked as the opener and had to do 15 minutes. I thought I had that aced but not so. Some of my stuff was pretty local to Milwaukee back then and time shrinks quickly for an aspiring comic in a new town. I was in over my head and I knew it after the first show. I’m very that lucky Kyle Nape was a good guy. He helped me make it through the week.
Getting that $150 was about as proud a moment as I’ve ever had in my life. I wanted to call my father and tell him but I knew he couldn’t have cared less. I didn’t have his number anyway so it wouldn’t have mattered but I felt like I had really accomplished something to get paid for going to a far away city and telling jokes on stage. Looking back on it - I did.
I sure have come a long way since that week. I know I wasn’t worth the $150 I got paid then but there have been many times since when I’ve given shows that have been the exact opposite. Now I feel like I’M the one getting ripped off. Back then I wasn’t ready for that but now I am over ready. It brought back memories to walk in the Funny Bone club today.
This is going to be a brutal weekend because the Steelers play on Saturday night at 8pm. That’ll kill both shows and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. Tonight we had fifteen people but they were nice and I easily did a strong 45 minute headliner set and didn’t even think twice. I wish I could have had myself back then see myself now. I‘d have loved it all.
No matter what happens this week I’ll be ok. I’m here to work and that’s what I’ll do all weekend. During the day I’m the King Of Uranus and at night I’m a comedy headliner. At least I’m in a nice hotel this time. It’s a beautiful Radisson with no urine smells anywhere.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
The King Of Findlay?
Wednesday January 2nd, 2008 - Findlay, OH
Findlay, OH? How did I wind up HERE? Much like much of the rest of my life this was an unexpected destination. The weather started getting rough…my tiny car was tossed. If not for the plastic of my credit card my Honda would be lost. My Honda would be lost. It got a little snowy and drifty and before I ended up in a ditch I decided to get a hotel room.
I already served my purpose of breaking up the drive to Pittsburgh. It was all sunshine in Chicago so I decided to leave around noon. I was supposed to be in Ann Arbor to meet up with Kate Brindle at 5:30ish but I hit a blizzard in Michigan and crawled for two hours. At least I had some books on tape with me and I listened to Nicholas Pileggi’s ‘Casino‘. That kept my mind off the snow and the traffic and really did make the time seem to pass faster.
I finally pulled in around 7 and we went to a great sushi place near the comedy club. We hadn’t seen each other in a while and I always love to hang out with her. She’s so opposite of me it’s hilarious but she’s really a sweetheart and I just like spending time with her. She is a vegan and that’s her thing so I don’t tease her about it. She had an asparagus roll with a bowl of miso soup and seemed to like it so God bless her. I had a nice big plate of sushi.
Kate really could do something in comedy in my opinion. She’s just so different from the typical white male comedian between 25-50. Unfortunately I’m in that group and I know I have had to struggle for everything I ever got. There are just too many of ‘us’. Kate has a whole different viewpoint and I bet in the internet age she could get a following of women especially but all people who share her beliefs. She could really turn that into a nice career.
I hope she does because there’s just not a nicer person I’ve ever met. She truly lives her talk and not many people do that. She wants to become a lawyer and do good with it and have a sanctuary for animals and all kinds of stuff that she really believes in. She goes over to Pamplona and protests the running of the bulls. How can you not respect that? I choose to protest in my own way by cheering for the bulls to gore all of those drunken imbeciles.
Kate would be someone I’d sign to my comedy record label. She’s different and that’s a good thing in comedy these days. We had a very fun meal but then came out to find a twin set of $25 parking tickets on each of our windshields. Happy New Year from Ann Arbor! I guess the meal wasn’t as cheap as I thought it was but it was still worth the long drive.
Not only did I get to hang out with Kate I also put a nice dent in the drive to Pittsburgh. I will have no problem getting there on time tomorrow and I’ll be rested and ready for the show. I feel much better doing it this way and it’s worth the price of the hotel room. I’m a lot more relaxed knowing I have a 200 mile drive ahead of me tomorrow than a 600 miler.
I didn’t forget about my business though. I re-listened to my tape series from E. Joseph Cossman about the mail order business. This is the third time I’ve heard them and I hear a lot of new things each time I listen. Today was no different and it put my mind in a place I want to be. I’ll keep forcing myself to think about being a businessman until I actually am.
Findlay, OH? How did I wind up HERE? Much like much of the rest of my life this was an unexpected destination. The weather started getting rough…my tiny car was tossed. If not for the plastic of my credit card my Honda would be lost. My Honda would be lost. It got a little snowy and drifty and before I ended up in a ditch I decided to get a hotel room.
I already served my purpose of breaking up the drive to Pittsburgh. It was all sunshine in Chicago so I decided to leave around noon. I was supposed to be in Ann Arbor to meet up with Kate Brindle at 5:30ish but I hit a blizzard in Michigan and crawled for two hours. At least I had some books on tape with me and I listened to Nicholas Pileggi’s ‘Casino‘. That kept my mind off the snow and the traffic and really did make the time seem to pass faster.
I finally pulled in around 7 and we went to a great sushi place near the comedy club. We hadn’t seen each other in a while and I always love to hang out with her. She’s so opposite of me it’s hilarious but she’s really a sweetheart and I just like spending time with her. She is a vegan and that’s her thing so I don’t tease her about it. She had an asparagus roll with a bowl of miso soup and seemed to like it so God bless her. I had a nice big plate of sushi.
Kate really could do something in comedy in my opinion. She’s just so different from the typical white male comedian between 25-50. Unfortunately I’m in that group and I know I have had to struggle for everything I ever got. There are just too many of ‘us’. Kate has a whole different viewpoint and I bet in the internet age she could get a following of women especially but all people who share her beliefs. She could really turn that into a nice career.
I hope she does because there’s just not a nicer person I’ve ever met. She truly lives her talk and not many people do that. She wants to become a lawyer and do good with it and have a sanctuary for animals and all kinds of stuff that she really believes in. She goes over to Pamplona and protests the running of the bulls. How can you not respect that? I choose to protest in my own way by cheering for the bulls to gore all of those drunken imbeciles.
Kate would be someone I’d sign to my comedy record label. She’s different and that’s a good thing in comedy these days. We had a very fun meal but then came out to find a twin set of $25 parking tickets on each of our windshields. Happy New Year from Ann Arbor! I guess the meal wasn’t as cheap as I thought it was but it was still worth the long drive.
Not only did I get to hang out with Kate I also put a nice dent in the drive to Pittsburgh. I will have no problem getting there on time tomorrow and I’ll be rested and ready for the show. I feel much better doing it this way and it’s worth the price of the hotel room. I’m a lot more relaxed knowing I have a 200 mile drive ahead of me tomorrow than a 600 miler.
I didn’t forget about my business though. I re-listened to my tape series from E. Joseph Cossman about the mail order business. This is the third time I’ve heard them and I hear a lot of new things each time I listen. Today was no different and it put my mind in a place I want to be. I’ll keep forcing myself to think about being a businessman until I actually am.
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