Doomsday And Mr. Bean

Saturday September 1st, 2007 - Salt Lake City, UT

New month new start. It’s September already and I’m starting to sound like my grandma asking ‘Where DOES the time go?’ She never did find an answer and I’m out of ideas too.

Wherever it goes it goes away. It seems like last month it was 2002 but that was five years ago. According to many futurists there is supposed to be some kind of cataclysmic horrific event on December 21st of 2012. That’s the date when the Mayan calendar ends and all the ‘experts’ are predicting doom and gloom for that date. There always seems to be a ‘day of doom’ in the foreseeable future and then it comes and goes and nothing bad ever happens.

When I was a kid the big thing was supposed to be the Bicentennial. Russia was waiting for that day to bomb us to smithereens because we’d all be watching fireworks and would not notice their bombs going off. I know it sounds goofy now but that was the big rumor.

Then in 1982 there was supposed to be all kinds of earthquakes and tsunamis because all the planets were in alignment for the first time in thousands of years. That was a big rumor too and I remember scientists being interviewed on TV and warning of epic catastrophes.

Then there was a book called ‘Christ by 1988 Returns’ and it listed all the prophecies in the Bible that said Jesus was guaranteed to come back by Rosh Hashanah of 1988. Nope. All the religious zealots were ready for it and there was one guy who sold all his things on earth and gathered his family in the living room on that day waiting for Christ to show up. I can imagine how that family conversation went around midnight when it didn’t happen.

Y2K was another panic date and the world was supposed to blow up then and it didn’t. People were building bomb shelters and packing them with 55 gallon drums of lima beans and macaroni noodles and they are still there today. Who wants to live after a holocaust if all there is to eat is lima beans and macaroni noodles? I’d rather get vaporized by a bomb.

Whether any looming disasters are on the horizon or not none of us have anything that’s guaranteed in this life. Any or all of us could go tomorrow and the older I get the more the fact that I’m mortal hits home. The world is big to us but in the universe it’s a tiny speck. I am just hoping to take my little ball of DNA while it’s living and squeeze what I can out of it before I’m back to dust where I came from. It’s all over so fast I don’t want to waste it.

I’ve been all over the place in my life and it’s only now that I feel like I’m starting to get a clue as to what I am doing. Between bouts of depression and radio firings and having no family support it’s taken me a lot of years to untangle all of that and see which way is up. I feel like I’m in a pretty good position to rattle some cages in life if I can just get a chance.

I have had a bumpy year in many ways but I feel like I’m ready to start making my run at something now. It’s been one shot to the face after the next but I’m still here and I am in a pretty good mindset actually. I’m a little rattled but all my faculties work and I am still in a position to make good things happen if I can get myself into a good groove and press on. I needed this weekend out here in Utah to get my head back together and it feels like I did.

Yesterday was a great way to close out the month of August so I decided to kick off the new one by seeing the Mr. Bean movie I’ve been wanting to see. I remember chatting with Rowan Atkinson online when I first got a computer back in the mid ‘90s and it was a huge thrill. He had an AOL account and I instant messaged him and it was really him. We talked back and forth a few times and then one day his account was turned off probably because I wasn’t the only one who contacted him. He was very nice and I have always been a big fan of his work. Normally I’m not a fan of British humor but the Mr. Bean character is genius.

Genius is subjective though and I know many people think he’s infantile or stupid. Can it really be proven whether or not someone is a comic genius? Adam Sandler has never made me laugh once but he has lots of movies out and millions of people enjoy him and he’s rich beyond anyone’s wildest dreams. Does that mean he’s a genius? Does anyone care? He’s a successful comedian by all definitions of the word but I wouldn’t see any of his movies for free. But that’s me. He doesn’t appeal to me at all but Mr. Bean’s character totally does.

I thought his videos were some of the funniest physical comedy I have ever seen. He has a goofy look and a rubber face and body and it just cracks me up not only because of what he does but because of how much he milks out of a simple premise. There is a lot of funny stuff he can squeeze out of a situation and make it look easy when I know how hard it is.

The reviews I read of this movie were scathing. I didn’t think it was a great movie but it didn’t merit the thrashing it got by the critics either in my opinion. There were some laugh out loud scenes in it and I thought it was worth the money. I was fascinated by his way of commanding the screen and becoming totally loose with his body. I thought he pulled off a few hilarious scenes with just a small gesture or a facial expression and that’s real talent.

Some of the scenes seemed to be derived from other movies but some were very original and as a whole I enjoyed it. I wanted to see it as a learning experience and it was. Maybe it will be me in a Mr. Lucky movie at some point. I wanted to see what he did and if I would do it differently or the same. I respected him for pulling it off and I’m glad I got to see it.

The shows at the club tonight were a bit difficult. The crowds were larger than yesterday but a lot stiffer. The early show made me work to get them but I did. I had to really sell it and I gave it all I had but I didn’t think I nailed it like I have been lately. After the show all kinds of people came up and told me they loved the show and I have to get used to how it is out here. They’ve not been to many comedy clubs and to them they really did enjoy it.

The late show had a table of people from New York of all places and they were loud and a little rude. I had to keep them at bay and I did but it was distracting and I couldn’t afford to experiment like I have been the rest of the week. I went with the hits and did enough to get by but I didn’t enjoy it as much as I have the rest of the week. I didn’t try playing with whether I should wear glasses or not or anything like that. I just gave my regular show.

This has still been a very productive week and I’m glad I came. I hope to close the week tomorrow with a strong show and then get back to Chicago and keep the good vibe going.