300 Miles Of Education

Wednesday November 28th, 2007 - Fort Smith, AR

Very good day today. Even though I had an unexpected day off without pay I still made the best I could out of it. The weather was perfect and I decided to make the drive over to Fort Smith where I’m performing tomorrow so I could relax and enjoy the day. It may get nasty tomorrow or my car could blow up or who knows what so I drove today to get it all over with. I’m glad I did. It’s almost 300 miles and it didn’t look like that far on the map.

As I was checking out of the musty funk pit from last night a woman came running up to the front desk and asked if I’d been the one in room 200. I told her I was and she was very apologetic to the point of being embarrassing. ‘Why didn’t you complain?’ she asked. ‘We don’t run a hotel like that. We would have been glad to switch your room immediately.’

I told her it was only one night and I thought all the rooms must have been like that. She was visibly shaken to hear that and I thought she was going to start crying. ‘Oh NO! It’s a total mistake and we would NEVER have let a customer stay in a room like that. Will you PLEASE forgive us and give us another chance?’ This lady really cared about my comfort.

This is the kind of customer service that’s lacking in the world. I had to tell her it wasn’t a big deal and it really wasn’t. I told her I was one of the comedians and that I wouldn’t be able to spread the word in town and even if I was able to I wasn’t going to. She was how I try to be with customers and I totally felt that she was genuinely concerned. I respect that.

Coming from someone who has made more than my share of mistakes in many areas I’m very sensitive to someone trying to make things right with me. Yes I was a little put off by it last night but after a night’s sleep and seeing the sunny weather I wasn’t upset at all. She handled the situation wonderfully and if I was ever in this town again I’d stay there again.

I hope I don’t have to come back to Jonesboro, AR any time soon though. No offense. I would like to think there are a lot more towns on my performance list ahead of Jonesboro. The bottom line is I got paid and my car started and I was already over the difficult show I had last night. Those people have forgotten about it too. They care about it less than me.

There was a Waffle House right down the street from the hotel and I love that place so I stopped in for a quick breakfast before heading out. Stereotypes would not be stereotypes if there wasn’t a grain of truth in there somewhere and the people working there had more teeth missing than a bad hockey team. I couldn’t believe it. My waitress had a front tooth missing and the cook had both of his gone. Another waitress had her bottom front teeth all knocked out and I thought I was in a dentist’s waiting room rather than a restaurant. I had all I could do to not stare but I couldn’t help it. I thought it was a banjo fan club meeting.

The people here aren’t mean at all and in fact they will start up a conversation without a reason. I could barely finish my breakfast because people on both sides of me were asking me questions about two different topics. I tried to be polite but after a while it got to be an imposition. I finished eating and paid my check and they still wanted to chat some more.

I finally had to duck out and I waved to all my new toothless friends. It made me cherish my own fortunes and even being Mr. Lucky has it’s advantages over having to work at the Waffle House in Arkansas with front teeth missing. There but for the grace of God go I. It was funny to see all of them with the grins that looked like human jack-o-lanterns though.

I brought a lot of CD selections with me on this trip because I knew I’d be driving a lot. I bought a program about the behind the scenes story of Saturday Night Live called ‘Live from New York’. It’s an 8 CD set and it is really well done. There are actors playing all of the original people but they present it well and it was totally interesting. I was never a big fan of that show in the beginning and later on I was working every Saturday when I got in the comedy business but it still was very informative to listen to the story of how it started.

Now that I’m starting my own business I am trying to study as much about other people who succeeded so I can hopefully learn from every one of them. Lorne Michaels built one of the most storied television shows in history and whether or not I’m a fan doesn’t begin to change that. I want to know how he did it because I want to build my own fun project.

There were problems and politics and personality conflicts and all the same stuff that’s in every other business. Some people win and others don’t. It was a fascinating listen but I’m not finished yet. I’m on CD 6 out of 8. I can save the last two for the big drive to Tulsa. It did make me much more appreciative of how difficult it is to create a fresh new concept.

Another CD that really hit home was a 25th anniversary Michael Jackson ‘Thriller’ CD. I found it a while back for $9 at a Target and forgot I had it. Say what you want about him now but Michael Jackson owned the whole entertainment world in the 80s. He was on fire both literally and figuratively and hearing this whole CD again really drove that home. It’s still a monster 25 years later and the best part was that it came with some bonus tracks.

There was a lot of great stuff including an interview with Quincy Jones. He talked about all the things that went into making it and how difficult it is to predict what will be a hit or not. It was also very fascinating to hear about how things fell together. Like with Saturday Night Live it was a concept that was strong and the pieces fell into place because creative people came together and created an energy that made it happen. I want to do the same.

Listening to all this sure made my drive a lot shorter. My mind was occupied for most of the drive and I really did learn a lot. I want to learn from the masters and be smart with the Uranus Factory Outlet concept. There are so many things I can see doing with it that now is the time to carve out a plan so at least I can get it up and running successfully before the problems start so I can have a chance to defend myself when they do. I feel good about it.

I never thought any of this would be problem free and I still don’t. It’s a matter of being able to work past my problems and keep it going. That’s what Lorne Michaels did and all the other people who ever did anything in the world. Colonel Sanders was a survivor and I am too. I always have been but I haven’t had any tangible success other than I have made a living as a comedian for my entire adult life. I guess that is a success but I can do more.