Ball Of Confusion

February 7th, 2008 - Lake Villa, IL

Back to disorganization. I was going stir crazy today and wanted to get out of my holed up gopher state and smell some outside air. I called up my friend Marc Schultz to see if a lunch was available and then I planned to go down to my mailbox in Chicago to pick up a load of mail. I still haven’t gotten all of my 1099s even though it’s way past the deadline.

Lunch with Marc is always relaxing and today was no different. We can talk about a lot of things but today we talked about what would put me over the top as a comedian. He’s a big supporter of mine and a booker of all kinds of acts and he said I have the talent but we need to package it in a way that he can sell it better. What I have now just doesn’t cut it.

I’ll need to really focus on keeping it clean if I do that and I’ll have to revert back to the suit and tie look I have used in the past. I don’t mind it at all but appearance does make an impact on a comedian’s character. I feel comfortable in a suit but someone pointed out to me that Mr. Lucky shouldn’t wear one because he’s not doing that well. That made sense.

But it really doesn’t matter unfortunately. I could be a white collar guy with bad luck or problems ala Drew Carey’s character. He always wore a suit and it fit him. I don’t really care which way it goes, I just want to work. I love being a comedian but the real money is in clean shows for larger groups of people. Many times those are in a corporate situation.

Marc is a great guy and has done well for himself since taking over his father’s agency. He’s been in the entertainment business his whole life and that’s why I listen to him. He’s very experienced and sharp and he’s in my corner and wants me to succeed. Yes of course I’d give him a cut if I got hot in that market but I know that’s not the reason he’s doing it.

We would make a great team though. He would represent me exclusively in those kinds of shows and he’s very credible doing it. He knows how to write contracts and has been a licensed agent for over twenty years. Higher paying convention type work can feel safe if they get a recommendation from a real agent. We talked about how to get into that circle.

Again, funny isn’t the first requirement. It’s being SAFE. I can work that way and have done it countless times but I’ll admit that’s not my first choice. My first choice is to go on stage and read the audience and let it rip to their vibe. More often than not I keep it on the clean side anyway but once in a while in the right situation I can pepper it up if I want to.

I grew up around bikers for goodness sakes. There isn’t a word or phrase or grouping of words and phrases that could ever make me flinch. I spent most of my childhood hearing my grandmother swear a lot worse than any biker gang combined. She could light it up as well as anyone I’ve ever heard so as far as I’m concerned those words don’t have impact.

That’s not the case in doing comedy however. It’s THE biggest fear of every booker and in the higher paid corporate type shows it’s to the point of obsession. If I did go that route I’d have to totally retool my sales package. I’m not sure if I can do that now. It’s too late.

Or is it? It never hurts to have options for work and if I could get booked 15-20 times a year it would probably pay all my bills. Unfortunately doing something like this is not just a part time thing. I’d probably have to go full bore into it and sell myself to other agencies around the country and that’s a huge task that would take lots of time and money to do.

And then there’s the King of Uranus. As goofy as that whole concept is I think it will be a big moneymaker if I can make it happen. I’m not that far away but I still don’t have any way of guaranteeing it will pay off in the short run. That is a completely different angle to work on and talking it over with Marc we agreed that doing both would be confusing.

At least I took the time to talk about it though. Just launching into something without an idea of where I want it to go is a mistake. I’ve already gotten things started as far as doing the Uranus business but I wanted to hedge my bets and see what Marc thought would give me a shot to really break through the pack. He’s got lots of experience and I respect that.

As much as I like and respect him I still don’t think he understands what I’m looking to do with the whole Uranus gimmick. He’s very traditional and that’s good because that’s a market that pays a living wage. He doesn’t waste his time on rinky dink stuff and that’s a thing we both agree on. I’m not looking to be the king of the small time toilets anymore.

Working places like the Northern Lights Theatre are where I want to be. I love working in those kinds of venues because it’s how show business should be. There is an attitude of respect just walking into a nice venue that adds an aura of professionalism. I am ready for those kinds of places and I want to claim my spot in them. But how can I best enter them?

I really don’t know for sure. The worst thing I can do is try to please everyone and I am not even thinking about that. I asked Marc what would put me over in his world of people who book higher paying shows and he told me the truth. It may not be what I wanted him to tell me but I know he didn’t sugar coat it. Now it’s up to me as to how I respond to it.

Doing what he said would cost me several thousand dollars in promo but it would pay a handsome dividend should I land a lot of work in that area. I’m just about the age where I could start doing that and it would pay me a lot more than I’m making now. Would it be a case of selling out? Maybe it would but what’s wrong with that? I’m in business to eat.

On the other hand I could keep going with the Uranus idea and use that to put myself on a different level by getting media attention. That’s a much bigger risk but it would be a lot more fun that’s for sure. It could be miserable though if it hits big and I’m trapped into an identity of ‘King of Uranus’ 24 hours a day. I don’t want to be the new Pee Wee Herman.

This is a very crucial time in my life and career and I didn’t think it would hurt to get an opinion from someone I trust. Plus it was good to get out of the house even if I did have a hard time digging my car out of the snow. It was completely buried. I got my mail but I’m still missing a few 1099s. Comedy clubs aren’t the best record keepers many times so it’s a good thing I have been getting better at it. I shouldn’t have any tax problems this year.