Monday March 7th, 2011 - Chicago, IL The older I get, the more I realize just how small a role I have in the big scheme of life. Here I am, an infinitesimal speck of cosmic dust drifting through the universe hoping I’ll be able to make some sort of positive impact somewhere. To date, I’ve failed miserably. I haven’t even come close. I look back at all the hopes and dreams I had as a newbie in comedy and what piss poor half ass results I actually managed to get, and it’s downright embarrassing. I didn’t put half a dent in what I wanted to, and now it’s getting late to do much of anything. Kansas was right, all we are is dust in the wind and I’m blowing away. Nothing makes me feel more that way than hosting the Rising Star Showcase at Zanies in Chicago. I haven’t done that in a long time because I was working on the cruise ships, and boy was there a loaded show tonight. There is a thriving new generation of talented comics coming up the ranks, and I can see the game passing me by. It’s very humbling. I’ve been getting a lot of that lately. Maybe I need it. I didn’t think I was getting too big for my britches, but maybe I was. Just about the time I thought I was doing halfway well, I see all these new kids coming up and it makes me think I missed the career boat entirely. One after another, I watched these kids go up and knock it out of the park. I was glad to give them all solid introductions and sacrifice myself for the good of the show, as that’s a major part of being a good emcee. Unfortunately, that’s not how to become a star myself. I don’t know if it’s being a star that I want though. I just want to have people come to a show to see me, not just come to a show I happen to be on no matter what position that is. Not one of the people in the audience tonight was there to see me, they just came to see a comedy show - and a great one it was. They got way more than they paid for this evening. Names that might not register much now like Adam Burke, Pat McGann, Emily Galati, Michael Isaac, Pablo Rodriguez (a new one), Ryan Wingfield, Nate Weatherup and Mike Lebovitz are all well on their way to making that dent in life I never found a way to make. They’re out there slugging it out like I did for so long, and I see bright futures for all of them. But, it’s a hard game and an even harder lifestyle. That’s what weeds out potential and thins the herd. I’ve seen many a talented performer get sidetracked by life’s foibles. I wish the best for all these kids coming up. I know how hard it is, and I see comedy in a whole new perspective from this side of the game. I know I can help young talent find a solid path, as I’ve hacked my way through the jungle and found some not so good ones. Bert Haas and I had dinner before the show. He wants to expand the comedy classes at Zanies, but there are severe space limitations. Bill Gorgo is doing a great job teaching the beginner levels, but eventually there will be more need for advanced classes. I still love to teach and mentor young comics, and I see there are all kinds of good ones on the way up.
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