Mail Bonding

Thursday December 20th, 2007 - Lake Villa, IL

My left hand is numb from all the Christmas cards I wrote out today but the rest of me is very pleased. I scoured my list of addresses and business cards and scraps of paper that I’d put all together in a box and kept on writing until I exhausted my supply of everything that I needed to keep the assembly line going. I used up all of my stamps, cards and envelopes.

That in itself felt good because I’d been sitting on many of the cards and envelopes for a couple of years now. I bought a bunch of new ones in Utah recently and they were all used and then I started in on the older ones. The good thing about Christmas cards are they will not spoil or go out of date. Plus these were funny and I always enjoy sending funny cards.

I tried to send one to everyone who has ever booked me and just say thanks for the shot. Some of the addresses I wasn’t 100% sure of but I tried them anyway. I’m sure a few will end up coming back but it was worth the risk. I felt great knowing that most of them have the right address and will get to the people they’re intended to reach. It will be very good to renew a lot of friendships and contacts I haven’t made in a while and blow the dust off.

Contacts are SO important. I have always been pretty good at it but I know I can take a giant leap forward with not that much effort. With the internet there is no excuse to have a lack of contacts and I am going to reconnect with as many people as I can in the new year.

It’s not that I’m going to suck up or ask them for anything or be a pest, I just want them to know what I’m doing now and hear what they’re doing and put each other in line for an opportunity to help each other out. If someone I knew years ago is doing something else it could be of mutual benefit to reconnect now on a different level. It’s just smart business.

Greg Phelps is a former comedian friend of mine from Indianapolis. Now he has his own business that duplicates CD and DVD projects and does artwork for them. Of course I am going to use him for my next project and it will be a win/win for everyone. That’s the main reason I took so much time sending all the cards out today. I want to rebuild my network.

It really isn’t that difficult but it does take a lot of work to maintain. People change their lives around and reinvent themselves just like I’m doing now. It’s especially true in those I have crossed paths with. I have many contacts in standup comedy, radio and pro wrestling and none of those businesses could be called ‘stable’. My contacts are constantly making a cross country move or taking time off for whatever reason and some flat out disappear.

I made a major step forward today in taking a few hours to write personal cards to many people I haven’t contacted in years. I know that it will lead to good at some point so I will chalk it up as an investment. It was about $150 total for now but it will be a huge bargain.

I really am starting to do some smart things back to back to back. If I keep doing all this kind of stuff like I have been the future really looks bright. I’m starting to find myself and I feel like I’m actually beginning to know what I’m doing. Now can I bring that to Uranus?

I sure blew it in comedy. At least when I started out. I had a lot of great opportunities if I had only known what to do with them. I blew chance after chance because I just was not ready for it then. I can say ‘woulda, coulda, shoulda’ all I want and I have but that’s not a valid excuse. Timing is everything and it’s only now that I know I’m ready for a big break.

It can sure be a cruel joke sometimes though. I remember it like it was yesterday as I sat across the lunch table from the guy who ran his ‘million dollar idea’ past me and asked me what I thought. I laughed in his face and told him he was wasting his time. He wasn’t very happy to hear it and told me he thought I was wrong. I told him he was a complete idiot.

I guess Jeff Foxworthy has done pretty well for himself without any more of my brilliant insights. I saw him years later and told him I’d be available for more career consultation if he needed any and we laughed about it. I will say he laughed a LOT harder than I did. I’m the idiot and I wholeheartedly admit it. I also admit I was 22 years old and inexperienced.

Jeff said he wanted me to be a part of it and write jokes for him and there’s where I was wrong. I should have taken that opportunity and ran with it just for the experience. Jeff is a super nice guy and I couldn’t be happier for his success but it kills me that it was there in my lap and I not only blew it I vehemently denied any chance of making it happen. Stupid.

Looking back on it now it made perfect sense but at the time I just didn’t have the vision I have now. My mistakes have been huge and painful and some I’ll never be able to repair but on the good side they didn’t kill me and I’m still alive to tell about it after the battle.

Granted, I am shell shocked and feeble from the war but my mind is sharp and I’m going into this new project with a LOT different perspective than I had when I started comedy. I have a calm wisdom now and that only comes from painfully earned experience. I’m ready to take my swings and it took me a lifetime to get the bat in my hands so I could do that.

I’m not going to blow this opportunity. In fact if I do it right I’ll reconnect with not only Jeff Foxworthy but all the other guys I crossed paths with when I started out. Drew Carey is also a great guy and I know he’d remember me. We worked many times and always got along very well. I should have kept in contact but again I let it lapse and that’s just dumb.

I did see Foxworthy years later and he said ‘Why didn’t you call me?’ I told him I didn’t want to make it look like I was asking for anything like everyone else was. He said ‘Yeah but YOU are someone I’d have helped if I could.’ And I bet he would have. He’s great. If I have ever had anything I’ve always helped as many people as I could even on my level.

It’s been many years but now I’m finally ready. When I do reconnect with Foxworthy or Drew or Jeff Garlin or Craig Ferguson or Kathleen Madigan or Frank Caliendo or any one of the people I’ve crossed paths with over the years I’ll not make that same mistake again.

Today was a great start in getting back on the right path. Whether the people I sent cards to ever become big stars isn’t the point. They’re good people and it never hurts to have as many of those in the address book as possible. I dusted off a few of those cobwebs today.