A Weak Week

Saturday March 22nd, 2008 - Vernon Hills, IL

This is not a good week for comedy. I knew that when I took the gig but it’s still not fun to have to perform for tiny audiences in a big venue. It would be like Van Halen playing a concert in an arena that’s only ten percent full. No matter how hard they rock it’s wasted.

That’s how I felt tonight at Zanies in Vernon Hills. There were two shows but we didn’t need that many. We could have fit both crowds into one show and still had room for more than were there. The first show had a grand total of a dozen people and in a 400 seat room that’s total death on a Ritz cracker. And two of them were people who used to work there.

They came out specifically to see me and even though I truly appreciate it that made it a little bit harder because they knew me personally. They sat right in front and it was sort of uncomfortable through the whole night. I did my best to suck it up and give them a show.

Jerry Agar and I got together before the show to have dinner at Famous Dave’s. Jerry is by himself this weekend because his wife and kids are in Florida while his son Tanner has a gig singing at Disney World with his high school swing choir. That kid’s doing alright. I am very happy for him but it also made me sad knowing I had to do a gig for only twelve.

Jerry has seen me a ton of times over the years and I always try to do something at least a little different when someone I know comes out to see me. I try to shuffle my bits into a different order every night and play each show by ear but sometimes it’s not always easy to do that. Some situations require a ‘play the hits’ energy but this show was kind of odd.

I got some laughs from everybody but it doesn’t shake the joint no matter how hard any dozen people laugh in that big of a room. I felt like I was wasting my time but I wanted to entertain both Jerry and the former people who used to work at the club. They came out to see me and I want to make that trip worth anyone’s while. I had my work cut out tonight.

It wasn’t fun for me at all and in fact it took the wind out of my sail a little. Actually the whole weekend did because none of the shows were very strongly attended. I don’t know how the other clubs in the country did but I really don’t care. I want to be a draw myself.

I’ve been trying to be one for many years and I haven’t figured it out yet. Hopefully I will.
I’m very thankful to be working though. A lot of other comedians are off this week and I don’t take it for granted. I also am taking my Gene Perret comedy writing course and it’s helping me sharpen my writing skills and discipline too. Now I need some people to show up and see what I’m working on. Twelve at a time is great in an orgy but not in comedy.

More than ever I need to find a way to turn a buck and have some security. If I have any smarts at all I’ll put my nose to the grindstone and crank out some way to make a little bit of financial security out of all the ideas I keep having. Ideas don’t pay the bills however. I need to stop dreaming and start DOING. I also need to get myself in front of someone in a position of power who can help me get noticed. I’ve worked way to hard to do it like this.