Wall Street Woes

Tuesday September 16th, 2008 - Lake Villa, IL

What a mess everything is right now. I’m looking around not only at my own life but at the entire world and I don’t know where to start. The TV and radio are all abuzz about the collapse of the stock market and how it’s like 9/11 all over again. It’s all very disturbing.

What’s even more disturbing is that I have no idea what they’re talking about. I’m not a financial guy and wouldn’t know a good stock from soup stock. That’s totally my fault as I’m sure I could have educated myself if I truly wanted to but I never wanted to. Money is something I always thought would just come to me when I needed it so I never studied it.

How wrong I was. Or was I? I have a few friends who did play the market and they lost not only their ass but the pants their asses rested in. All that’s left are a bunch of bald bare scorched red asses that got burned on Wall Street. They’re broke and so am I but at least I had the cahones to go broke doing what I love to do. I also learned how to live like a bug.

My means have been up and down but mostly down over the years. I squeak by with my comedy income and whenever I’ve had radio jobs I’ve been good about saving and then it all dwindles when I get fired. I had some money from my last job at the Loop but now it’s pretty much dwindled and I’m painted into a corner. I need to make money my ally now.

I know it’s not too late to do that and I also know even if I did make my millions soon I wouldn’t piss it away on ‘Hershey bars and Archie comics’ like my grandpa used to say. I would live way beneath my means and that money would be both a security blanket and a chance to help people who really need it more than me. I’d give most of it away. Really.

There is a total joy in giving and I’ve always known that. Whatever I’ve had I have tried to share with as many people as I could and I will always do that until I die. I’m a giver. It has come back to bite me in the ass more than once but in the long run I’m WAY ahead.

I want to be able to use any fame I achieve or money I make for the good of others and I know that sounds corny but I really feel that way. I guess I could go visit a kid somewhere in a hospital and I’d be happy to do it now but it would mean a lot more if I were famous.

But would it really? This is kind of a chicken and egg argument and I’m not up for that. I know I am not where I want to be in my life in many ways and part of it is that I haven’t done the correct things to get there. Some of it is my own fault and maybe it’s more than I am admitting. I need to build good habits in other areas that have stuck like this diary has.

I received quite a few unexpected heartfelt messages today from a wide range of people telling me they already miss reading my daily exploits. I knew I had a few readers but not as many as who took time to write and offer an encouraging word. I was very moved by it and will answer every one of them when I can. Knowing I have made if even a little bit of an impression on some people in a positive way makes me feel great. I remember hearing in radio that ONE phone call equals at least 1000 listeners. I had a few readers after all.