Oshkosh Obstacles

Saturday September 29th, 2007 - Oshkosh, WI/Lake Villa, IL

More ups and downs today. The downs weren’t horrible and the ups weren’t great. That doesn’t bother me at all. I could use a little stability right now. Too many things are going on at once and I need to take a step back and take an inventory of where my life is headed.

The first down came when I overslept this morning. I have been hitting it pretty hard and I haven’t been sleeping either well or a lot. I was supposed to be at Jerry Agar’s house this morning at 8:30 to ride with him and his wife Ann to go see his son Tanner play football. I woke up at 7:15 and wanted to get another fifteen minutes of sleep. I woke again at 8:10.

It’s about a half hour ride to Jerry’s house and I got there in record time but still I was a little late and we missed part of the first quarter. Jerry’s mother in law was in town visiting and she wanted to see the game too. Of course Tanner scored a touchdown before we got there and I felt like a complete jackass. Lucky for me he scored another one and they beat the snot out of the other team 41-6. Tanner had 102 yards and looked like Walter Payton.

After the game Jerry drove me over to the AAMCO transmission shop in Waukegan so I could pick up the Honda before 1pm when they closed. After everything it cost me $1948 but I have a new rebuilt transmission with a one year warranty. The guy who owns it is the kind of guy you want working on your car. He’s German and very meticulous and he does high quality work. I’ve gone to him before. His name is Rudy and he builds a mean tranny.

This was a calculated risk. I have a car repair emergency fund and this was most of it. A Honda Accord is about the most reliable car on the road and even though it has high miles on the engine this car has had care. Even Rudy told me it was smart to rebuild it because a new car would cost ten times more. He’s right but it doesn’t mean the motor won’t blow.

Anything and everything can happen to a car without notice. To risk $500 is one thing. I got more than my money’s worth out of that car even with a $200 auction fee added on to the $500 price. I’ve driven all over in that car trouble free. I could have junked it but I still think I did the right thing. The interior is pristine and the motor is strong and it runs great.

After taking Jerry back home I laid down to take another nap for an hour or so. Again it turned into three hours and I was now pushing it for my gig in Oshkosh tonight. I took my fastest shower in a long time and shaved fast hoping not to slice my cheek like corned beef in a deli and I didn’t. I splashed on my sexiest cologne and ran up the stairs to start driving so I wouldn’t be late. I would be cutting it very close and this is not how I like to work.

I tried calling the club but nobody answered the phone. I wanted to let them know I may be there right on time or a little late but I’d definitely be there. Now they had no clue and I can’t stand that situation. I’ve been in it way too many times and it’s always a big hassle to get there on time. Then when I do it usually is less than half full and they start late anyway.

Tonight wasn’t much different. I got there at 7:52 and the place was pretty empty because there were about six other events in town tonight that took business away from the club.
This was a very tough show. The degree of difficulty was on red alert and I had to really be on my toes the whole time or I could have been in big trouble. The owner’s brother is a cop and was in charge of the show tonight. He was a good guy and I sensed he didn’t take any guff from anyone. He told me if I needed anyone thrown out he would take care of it.

I think he was almost hoping something would happen. He seemed to be eager to help in the extermination of idiots and I for one am all for that. I wanted to buy him some ammo if he needed to clean house during my set but he seemed to be loaded up pretty well himself.
The show was in a bar that just started doing comedy. They like it so much they’re using different comedians for Friday and Saturday nights. That isn’t usually done and I think that may be difficult to maintain but for now it’s working out for them. I like the booker and he is also a comedian so he understands how difficult it is to pull off shows for loud drunks.

There were several loud drunks in the audience tonight but not all. By show time I’d say there were about 80 people in a room that probably sat 200 or a little more. They hadn’t a clue as to what to expect and the emcee was brand new and absolutely horrendous. He did nothing to make the show any better and on top of that he was extremely dirty. There isn’t a legitimate reason for any opening act/emcee to drop any F-bombs at all. Not even ONE.

It’s not good business and it doesn’t set the right tone for a show. By no means am I any kind of a prude and I can cuss it up with the best of them if I have to but the opening spot on a show in a dance club in Oshkosh is not the place to be Richard Pryor. It‘s not smart.

The scheduled opening act was even worse. I like the guy personally off stage but he did about as filthy a set as I’ve seen in a long time. Not only did he drop F’s all over he ran the gamut of disgusting body fluids and every other uncomfortable premise that not only has a numbing effect on an audience, it can alienate people too. He did do that to a few who left during his act but the ones who loved it (and there were quite a few) REALLY loved it so that would make it even harder for me to have to overcome that. My job was hard tonight.

I also had hecklers to deal with from every direction. One female (I can’t call her a lady) in front would NOT shut up. Her boyfriend was a hippie looking dude and he wouldn’t try to shut her up at all. She was gassed and not very attractive but I couldn’t ignore it as all I could hear from the stage was her incessant booze-o-babble. I tried being polite to start as I usually do but then it got a little less sugary and I asked her to ‘shut it or show it’. That’s usually the end of it but she decided to whip her boobs out and disgust the front row. I can usually find a way to enjoy breasts in any situation but she was so obnoxious that even that didn’t make the situation any better. I made some jokes about it and got some big laughs.

That’s the problem. I got big laughs all night. I purposely kept it professional and didn’t swear much at all to prove it could be done. Those other guys made it hard for me and it’s not fair that I had to spend a lifetime polishing a craft to have to follow this. I didn’t bitch to anyone at the club and I bit my lip and kept quiet until I got paid. I shook hands and did what I needed to do to get my cash. I earned every penny tonight and I’m glad this is over.