9/11 Is A Joke

Friday September 11th, 2009 - Salt Lake City, UT

There’s never going to be anything funny about thousands of people losing their lives in a single day, but I have to reluctantly say I think 9/11 is a total joke. Some call it an inside job while others call it a conspiracy. Isn’t that the same thing? That depends on who’s the one being asked. Whatever it was it still stinks eight years later. Something‘s fishy here.

Am I getting cynical in my old age? No, not at all. I was plenty cynical in my youth too. I’m just trying to figure out what life is all about. The more I dig into it the more it seems most of us are just dung beetles pushing our big wet balls of poo across the desert daily.

We really don’t seem to mean much in the big picture and those who run things aren’t about to relinquish power any time soon. The older I get the more I think the world was a cesspool long before I ever got here and will be long after I leave. I’m not part of the tribe who runs things on the grand scale, no matter who ‘they’ are. And I do think ‘they’ exist.

Maybe I’m crazy but I’m not stupid. Something’s going on in a place higher than us that produces results that trickle down to the masses. I’m not sure who’s behind it but it would be nice if they had us dung beetles in mind once in a while but apparently that’s not going to happen any time soon. We get the brunt of their actions and have to live with it daily.

When I was a kid in the ‘70s there were gasoline ‘shortages’ and people believed it. The energy ‘crisis’ was going to be the end of us all and we’d have to all ride bicycles to work instead of drive our cars. By the end of the century we were supposed to be totally tapped.

What happened? Where did all this new oil magically come from? They also told us we would freeze to death from ‘global cooling’. Ha! Another lie from ‘them’. Al Gore took it to the opposite level with global warming but he’s a babbling idiot too. It’s all a big scam.

Who’s doing it and for what reasons I can’t say but I think 9/11 is in the same category. It must have served some higher purpose none of us out here in the trenches will ever see and I for one am very disgusted by it all. Thousands of innocent people lost their lives and I think it’s wrong. So does everyone else with a conscience but we don’t seem to matter.

Then we’re at ‘war’ against ‘terrorists‘. Why do we have to have wars all the time? Is it about money? I have to say yes. Are there really terrorists that were behind 9/11? Maybe I don’t get it but it sure doesn’t seem that way from where I see it. I don’t think they’d stop.

Wouldn’t someone who is trying to destroy us keep trying? If they scored a major hit on us, why stop there? I wouldn’t, but I’m not a terrorist. But if I were, I wouldn’t have let it end with that one opening campaign. The whole thing seemed staged and I’m suspicious.

Was there a real ‘threat’ of communism in Vietnam? Look at all the soldiers that had to lose their lives over that big mess. Again, who makes that call to keep starting things like that, knowing thousands will die? I guess I don’t grasp how the big picture works in life.

My cynicism deepens as I get older but I think the dark side of human nature gravitates toward positions of power. Greed and lust for power get out of hand and it seems like we all are susceptible to the temptation of it. Who knows what any of us would do if we had total power? None of us can say unless we get that chance but most dung beetles won’t.

I don’t know what to think about any of this but I do think about it. I can’t help it. Who in the world over about 12 years old doesn’t remember 9/11/01? It’s THE biggest event in our current lifetime and I happen to think it wasn’t an accident. I know I’m in the kook of the month club, but I was there before. If I’m wrong I’ll admit it but I sure don’t think so.

I won’t go as far as to call it a government conspiracy just because I don’t think they are that organized. On the other hand, I don’t think a bunch of rag tag Muslim extremist types could pull it off either. Who did it? Who knows? All I know is it’s very sad and I wish the families of the victims peace and comfort and I also wish the same for our brave soldiers.

The soldiers who died in Vietnam and Iraq were brave and fought for the America most of us are brought up to believe exists. I love that America and if I had to die for it I totally would. It isn’t the fault of those who protect us, it’s the fault of whomever starts this stuff.

Everyone remembers where they were on 9/11/01. Coincidentally I was living right here in Salt Lake City then and had just lost my radio job. I was in a funk and that made it a lot funkier. Everything shut down and I felt like I was cut off from civilization way out here.

Everyone was depressed and wondering what was happening and then after several days of that everyone needed a laugh. I got a gig in Elko, NV because nobody could fly and the person booked couldn’t get there so I filled in. There were two shows that night and I had a very hard time getting laughs in the first one. Nobody really knew how to react to it yet.

Then, the late show was like nothing I’d ever experienced. Laughter exploded in every direction and it was one of the purest experiences I’ve ever had onstage or off. People in the audience came up to me crying after the show and hugged me and thanked me for the laughs. We were all Americans and we all loved our country and this was a way to heal.

Now, are we really still that patriotic? I have to say unfortunately no. I don’t see nearly as many flags as I did then and 9/11 seems to have just glossed over and we move on. It’s getting farther and farther in the past and it’s hard to believe it’s been eight years already.

Whatever the real story of 9/11 is or who’s really in charge of the world is something I can’t control. I have a hard enough time controlling myself and my own little dung beetle existence onstage and off. That’s what I focused on tonight and we had two fun shows at Wiseguys in West Valley City. The crowds weren’t huge but they sure did come to laugh.

My little opinion doesn’t mean much in the big scheme of things. The damage has been done. I send out a special vibe to the victims and families of 9/11 and also those who put it all on the line in our Armed Forces. They deserve it. The ones who did it can go to hell.