Wednesday, February 23, 2011

As My Cabin Gently Shrinks

Sunday February 20th, 2011 - Galveston, TX

   Four days into the trip, and this is when my cabin starts to shrink. It’s small enough as it is, but being in it over three days gets to be tough. There’s nowhere to go, but I want to be anywhere but inside these four walls - even if it does have a port hole. It feels like prison.

   This is the part of this gig that makes it such a challenge. If I don’t come up with a rigid list of things to do, I’m screwed. I’ll just lay around most of the day to divert my attention away from the boredom of sitting in my cabin. That’s not productive, and not fun either.

   I totally see where vices could pass the time better, and I’m thankful I don’t have any of those to worry about. If I drank, it would be easy to bathe my loneliness in hooch and I’m sure some people do exactly that. It’s not the answer I seek. I need to work through it, and use all this down time as an opportunity to work uninterrupted and develop my projects.

   There’s plenty of time for reading and plenty of time for writing too. I try to bring a few books with me each time I come out, and get through as much of them as I can. This time I brought a book about Wally Amos, the guy who branded himself as ‘Famous Amos’ and then lost his own name in court when he sold his cookie company. His story interests me.

   What would I do if I had to completely start over and not be able to use ‘Mr. Lucky’ as a moniker? Would I be wiped out? Unfortunately, no I wouldn’t. I really haven’t done as much with that title as I could, and I’ve never been able to get famous with it. Wally did with his cookies, and then had to start over from scratch. That takes guts and I respect it.

   Can lightning strike twice? I think it can, depending on the person. If someone believes in their abilities and is willing to take calculated risks, I see no reason why success can’t happen an infinite amount of times - at least in theory. I want to experience it once first.

   I really haven’t had that one big run that people dream of. Not yet, anyway. Every time I was up for it, something happened and it got smeared like an ant hill. I thought I had a big radio run coming on The Loop, and we were almost there, but we got fired in about a year into it right as we were starting to take off. That would’ve been a great run had is lasted.

   It may have been local, but Chicago is a good place to be a local celebrity. It’s a big city all the way, and I’d have been financially secure about now, probably for life the way I’m able to live like a cockroach and like it. That one still hurts, but it’s over and that’s that.

   There are no guarantees for anything, and I know that. I took a calculated risk and it was a good one at the time, even though it eventually blew up in my face. The cruise ship gigs pay ok, but they’re not the kind of success run I’m talking about. It’s not a career maker.

   So ok, what is then? I’ve got all this time to develop something that IS my big entrance, so it’s time to shut up and get it done. It could be a book, script, course or all of the above in some form or another. I’ve got eight more days on this trip to hack away at something.

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Posted via email from Dobie Maxwell's "Dented Can" Diary

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