Thanks To All Veterans

Tuesday November 11th, 2008 - Lake Villa, IL

Veterans Day. One thing I will not joke about is how grateful I am for my freedom as an American citizen. It was drilled into me by my grandfather and I still remember his telling me any chance he got how lucky I was to be born where I was and not to ever forget it. As long as I live I won’t forget it even if the direction our nation is going doesn’t thrill me.

People gave their lives by the untold thousands so I can call myself the King of Uranus. I have to believe a lot of countries would have locked me up by now and thrown away the key. Maybe they’d be right but in America I have freedom to pursue my big idea anyway.

In retrospect I don’t think it would have hurt me to have served in the military. I almost went in right out of high school but I backed out at the last minute. I had no idea of what I wanted to do back then and was still entertaining dreams of being a professional baseball pitcher. I don’t think that was in the cards either but now I wish I’d have done them both.

The main thing both of those things would have done was scratch my travel itch. I had a bad case of wanderlust and wanted to go ANYWHERE but Milwaukee. Either baseball or a stint in the military would have let me see some places and meet some different people I wouldn’t have met if I’d stayed home and worked at a factory like a lot of my friends did.

Now all those factory jobs are gone and so is the youth of my generation. There are a lot of people my age who have mortgages and kids and a bad marriage and their hopes are all dead. They never got out and saw the country and for most of them it’s too late for it now.

I am SO glad I found comedy and stayed with it all these years. For whatever heartbreak I’ve felt I’ve had ten times more satisfaction knowing I love what I do and I chose to do it as my vocational pursuit. All those places I didn’t get to see playing baseball or signed up in the military I saw as a comedian and I enjoyed every one of them. I found my calling.

Still on this day I think of all those who gave the ultimate sacrifice and I’m grateful that I live in a place so many people are willing to fight for. I personally think war is stupid for many reasons but on this particular planet full of stupidity it seems to be an activity that’s way too common. If I had my way and ran a planet there wouldn’t be any wars to fight.

But I don’t run a planet or a country or a city or a block. I run me. That’s it. There are a whole lot of people I’m not fond of but I don’t plan on killing them. I’m fine with staying away from them and hopefully we can all just live out our lives in peace. I’m a big fan of peace but that’s not how it works on this planet. People seem to have to have blood here.

Just because I don’t like war or approve of mass killing doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate everyone who died to give me the freedom to say that because I totally do. Veterans Day is a day of reflection and I don’t want to make any of those deaths unimportant or wasted. It’s up to me and all of us to not allow this country to crumble and rot and I for one have a burning desire to not only end all wars but also to honor the sacrifices of those who died.